J. R. R. Tolkien Quotes

Holly: Seriously, you don't like unicorns? What kind person doesn't like unicorns? Justine: What kind of a person doesn't like zombies? What have zombies ever done to you? Holly: Zombies shamble. I disapprove of shambling. And they have bits that fall off. You never see a unicorn behaving that way. Justine: I shamble. Bits fall off me all the time: hair, skin cells. Are you saying you disapprove of me?

I can be sarcastic.

At this point, we've ripped on everyone.

A roast is like a get-together where people come down and talk about you and dog you out, the way you came up, the knucklehead things that you did, stuff like that.

I don't know how to troll people, but there are many out there talking with that intent. I just write something funny that would make people laugh.

I can make fun of someone and still be a fan.

I knew how to come up with jokes at someone's expense really fast.

Romeo was cute …” “Cute?” Alessandro rolled his eyes. “What kind of man is cute?” “… and an excellent dancer …” “Romeo had feet of lead! He said so himself!” “… but most importantly,” I concluded, “he had nice hands!

She's magnificent," Radius said, smiling proudly as he vaulted the steps and followed Aphrodite. "I can think of a lot of m words that she could be. Magnificent isn't one of them," Stark grumbled. "Mental and mean pop into my head," I said. "Manure pops into mine," Stark said. "Manure?" "I think she's full of shot, but it's too many words and doesn't start with an m, so that's as close as I could get," he said.

These stories about my intellectual capacity really get under my skin. You know, for a while I even thought my staff believed it. There on my schedule first thing every morning it said, 'Intelligence Briefing.'

Can the sarcasm,' he said. 'Please, I always use fresh sarcasm, never canned.

I'm the guy in the crowd making fun of the hero's shirt.

There's a man outside with a big black mustache. - Tell him I've got one.

Silverfish looked down. "Oh. Are you a dwarf?" Cuddy gave him a blank stare. "Are you a giant?" he said. "Me? Of course not!" "Ah. Then I must be a dwarf, yes."

What are you doing in there, waxing your mustache?” Iggy yelled, pounding on the bathroom door. I yanked the door open and pushed him backward hard, making him stagger. “I don’t have a mustache, you idiot!” Iggy giggled and put his arms up to protect himself in case I punched him. “And you know what?” I added. “You don’t have one either. Well, maybe in a couple years. You can always hope.” I left him in the hallway, anxiously fingering his upper lip.

I don't think I'm too mean to celebrities. I poke fun, but I think in the end, they always win.

Ladies and Gentlemen, King of the Stupid Question: Todd Grisham!

I think you should, yeah. You should wash your beard, then shave it off, nail it to a Frisbee and fling it over a rainbow.

Do they always flirt with biblical quotes?" Asil asked Tad. In long-suffering tones, Tad said, "They can flirt with the periodic table or a restaurant menu. We've learned to live with it. Get a room you guys."

Can't you see me as king of the Hereford ranchers, Lucy?" "Oh, I can see you, all right... I can see you riding out on your beautiful palomino checking the herd... There you sit, silhouetted against the evening sky... Sucking your thumb and holding that stupid blanket!

I'm not so much a dragon slayer, more a dragon annoyer -- I'm a dragon irritater.

Gentlemen, Chicolini here may talk like an idiot, and look like an idiot, but don't let that fool you: he really is an idiot. I implore you, send him back to his father and brothers, who are waiting for him with open arms in the penitentiary. I suggest that we give him ten years in Leavenworth, or eleven years in Twelveworth.

Awww," Minho said. "That's almost as sweet as that time she slammed the end of a spear into your shuck face.

In regards to Oral Roberts' claim that God told him that he would die unless he received $20 million by March, God's lawyers have stated that their client has not spoken with Roberts for several years. Off the record, God has stated that 'if I had wanted to ice the little toad, I would have done it a long time ago.

I haven’t got the heart to take the mickey out of him, even,” said Fred, looking over at Ron’s crumpled figure. “Mind you . . . when he missed the fourteenth . . .” He made wild motions with his arms as though doing an upright doggy-paddle. “Well, I’ll save it for parties, eh?