Aldous Huxley Quotes

Tis not her coldness, father, That chills my labouring breast; It's that confounded cucumber I've ate and can't digest.

I'm not big on the pasty because they say the pastry in the pasty can bring on indigestion.

Dyspepsy is the ruin of most things: empires, expeditions, and everything else.

Doctor, do you think it could have been the sausage?

The cynic, a parasite of civilization, lives by denying it, for the very reason that he is convinced that it will not fail.

And I remember wondering why it was that eating something good could make me feel so terrible, while vomiting something terrible could make me feel so good.

I'm sick. I've eaten civilisation and I'm sick.

The nice thing about anger is that, as an emotion, it's strong enough to unplug me from the comedian's mind for a minute and just be a frustrated member of the citizenry.

Unanimity of opinion is characteristic of savages and civilization only advances as more and more people have the right to call wrong what the majority calls right..

The European talks of progress because by the aid of a few scientific discoveries he has established a society which has mistaken comfort for civilization.

There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he less savage than the other savages.

I've barfed in movies before. It seems like it always ends up being Campbell's soup mixed with something else.

Pizza makes me throw up!

I could eat a feeling faster than anybody, put a little hot sauce on it and wouldn't recognize it until it showed up on my behind three days later.

You are an ignorant schoolgirl. You think civilization is a good thing.

[A]nother important difference between tourist and traveler is that the former accepts his own civilization without question; not so the traveler, who compares it with the others, and rejects those elements he finds not to his liking.

There was an old man of Orleans, Who was given to eating of beans; Till once out of sport, he swallowed a quart, That dyspeptic old man of Orleans.

Indigestion: A disease which the patient and his friends frequently mistake for deep religious conviction and concern for the salvation of mankind. As the simple Red Man of the Western Wild put it, with, it must be confessed, a certain force: 'Plenty well, no pray; big belly ache, heap God.'

You can best serve civilization by being against what usually passes for it.

There is the vegetarian Hot Pocket for those of us who don't want to eat meat, but would still like diarrhea.

I ate the Green Monster. It tasted pretty nasty. It was pretty painful.

I don't actually have cable. I watch TV, but only shows that I buy on DVD. As a result my TV rage factor is pretty low right now. I do have a real distaste for those extreme makeover shows. I once caught a roommate watching one and proceeded to rant for almost 15 solid minutes about how, in watching that bullshit, she was actively contributing to the destruction of all civilization.

Reject the basic assumptions of civilization, especially the importance of material possessions.

I'm not trying to write a bleak and blistering screed against American civilization. I'm writing something that I hope is fun and satirical and full of possibility.

Civilization is not an incurable disease, but it should never be forgotten that the English people are at present afflicted by it.