David Letterman Quotes

“Vote early and vote often” is the Politishun’s golden rule.

No election in the United States is wholly free from human or machine error.

We will soon know whether the Supreme Court choose the President of the United States or the people of Florida chose the President.

The only way they could win the election was by stopping the voting in Florida.

the idea that you have to wait on line for eight hours to cast your ballot in Florida -- there's something the matter with that. You think people can work all day and then pick up their kids at child care or wherever, and get home and then have a -- still manage to sandwich in an eight-hour vote? Well, Republicans, I guess, can do that, because a lot of them have never made an honest living in their lives. But for ordinary working people, who have to work eight hours a day, they have kids, they got to get home to those kids, the idea of making them stand for eight hours to cast their ballot for democracy is wrong. We ought to make voting easier to do. Mail

Maryland first allowed early voting during the 2010 primary elections. In November 2012, more than 16 percent of registered voters in Maryland cast their ballots during the early voting period, and some polling places, particularly in our larger jurisdictions, witnessed early voting lines that were hours long.

Can't wait for tomorrow when I get to exercise my patriotic duty as an American: Complaining about how long it's taking to VOTE.

Elections officials here in California are concerned that having 247 candidates would require a ballot so long it would be difficult to count. Today in Florida they said, 'What? You count the ballots?'

Florida's number three industry, behind tourism and skin cancer, is voter fraud.

For a long time, there has been lingering doubt among many Americans about integrity and fairness of elections. And it's not a new issue at all. If you look at polling data, it goes back decades.

While the left will attempt to drown out Trump's political accomplishments with unfounded allegations of Russian collusion, the voters who made Trump commander-in-chief will likely reach a different conclusion. Trump has proven himself loyal to the voters who put him there.

People should not be voting based on caste, religion, money, or liquor but real issues that affect their lives.

Donald Trump won the election. I think that's true. I also think there was interference. If this was another country, I think we'd be demanding another election.

You know, when you have a million plus names on the rolls, people who aren't voting or are inactive, dead, people who have moved away, that's a massive pool of potential voter fraud opportunities for those who want to be able to steal elections.

Yeah, President-elect Trump is many things. To his voters, he's a beloved figure. But one of the things he is, is a conspiracy theorist.

It's hard to be a national punch line unless lots of voters have soured on you.

Jeff Sessions has some problematic spots on his history, but he has been a pretty normal, respectable senator, more conservative than a lot of us, but a respectable senator for a long period of time.

Florida is not going to vote for a con artist like Donald Trump.

People that have died 10 years ago are still voting, illegal immigrants are voting.

The Republican-controlled House voted to repeal the healthcare bill. If that goes well, they'll see what they can do about this whole 'women voting' thing.

In America, we do cheat. We have people who cheat in elections.

The first election in which all South Africans took part was in April, 1994. There were long queues [lines] of employers and employees, black and white. In the sense of Africans, Coloreds and Indians - when I talk about blacks, I mean those three. Blacks and whites mingled to vote without any hitches. Many people would have expected a great deal of tension, clashes and violence, but it did not occur.

When I ran for mayor of New York City, the first time, some people voted eight and ten times. And second time I had firefighters and police officers outside checking on the buses so we take down the number of the bus, the bus had voted ten times, and wouldn't let the bus vote again.

You aren't just voting for the president. So many issues that affect your everyday life are decided locally on that ballot as well. So go get that god damn sticker. Your country needs you.

Marco Rubio doesn't go to the United States Senate. I must say, if I were a United States senator, I would be so honored to be in that magnificent chamber voting for the people of Florida.