Neil Patrick Harris Quotes

I think watching Channing Tatum caress his Lego Oscar statue will be something I won't forget. Even if I try.

Man, I had a good time working on 'Grown Ups 2.' First of all, when I read the script, it is hands-down the funniest script I've ever read. It's laugh-out-loud funny.

Bribes and boy bands. That’s all you need to be a babysitter.

I was at the New York Film Critics Circle Awards one year - they called me up when somebody canceled two days before the thing, and asked me to present some awards. So I went, and one of the funniest film moments I've ever had was when they introduced the New York film critics. They all stood up - motley isn't the word for that group. Everybody had some sort of vision problem, some sort of damage - I had to bury myself in my napkin.

We actually talked about Adam Sandler during the creation of 'Trolls,' because he does know how to time jokes.

Hollywood -- that's where they give Academy Awards to Charlton Heston for acting.

Sunday is the Academy Awards. Every time an actor says, 'I didn't expect this,' Ruth Bader Ginsburg will do a shot.

All TV is, is really: 'Don't you want to be this, aren't you glad you're not that.' There's nothing really in the middle.

Ocean's 13 is all about cool people having a good time, and who doesn't want to see that? Well you, apparantly, 'cause you're watching me.

Comedy is a wonderful device for distance that allows us to look at what we're talking about with some degree of distance and hopefully with a bit more perspective and honesty. With many exceptions, a movie with no jokes is far less appealing to me.

I gravitated toward being a funny guy. I liked the radio comedians. I lived in the Golden Age of radio, and the Golden Age of television came along when I was still in my early teens.

At the upcoming Grammy Awards, Jennifer Lopez and Marc Anthony will perform together as the first time, as man and wife. Hopefully music.

I'm paid to make an idiot out of myself. Why do you do it for free?

When I was a little kid, I used to say, "I would rather host the Oscars than win an Oscar." To me, that seemed like the more appealing, fun gig.

Quinn Cummings is a master story-teller and her book is nothing short of delightful. Her insights into topics like celebrity, parenting, and cats with a taste for homicide are pithy and uproarious and not to be missed. Notes from the Underwire is charming, hilarious, and just snarky enough to be ultimately satisfying.

TV is the rat race of the century.

I have never seen it (Jaws 4) but by all accounts it is terrible. However, I have seen the house that it built and it is terrific.

I think being successful in comedy is being funny and making jokes - anything beyond that is the icing on the cake.

My job is to go out and entertain the most people possible. The job is to make people laugh. I don't have a mission. I don't have a torch to burn.

The whole thing about working in front of the camera is to make people laugh when they're not supposed to.

Comedies are doing well because I think people want to laugh and not think about everything for a little bit.

I'm onstage for an hour.I do an hour of stand-up. Actually, I do 10 minutes standing up and 50 minutes sitting in a chair. Oh, occasionally, I stand up again to do a dance or put over a song. But mostly I sit down. A great invention, sitting down.

People want to be amused, not preached at, you know. Morals don't sell nowadays.

If Jay spent as much time studying as he does trying to be a comedian, he'd be a big star.

Y'know, if those pews reclined, and the priests gave the Raiders scores I'd go to church every Sunday.