Carol Ann Duffy Quotes

Everything is ironic to me. There are moments I find hysterical, but I'm probably the only one who would find that, except for a few people.

When I really have it together, I think I successfully pull off looking like the exact middle point between Macklemore and Ron Howard, only with a much bigger forehead than either of them.

The caricature of my own face always makes me laugh.

I finally have the body I want. It’s easy, actually, you just have to want a really shitty body.

I don't consider my homosexuality a political thing. I consider it a sexual and spiritual thing. I only started going to political rallies to meet women.

She was, in fact, quite a pleasant looking girl, even if her bosom had clearly been intended for a girl two feet taller; but she was not Her. The Egregious Professor of Grammar and Usage would have corrected this to "she was not she," which would have caused the Professor of Logic to spit out his drink.

Cultures that don't laugh at themselves are cults.

You can get away with saying much more with humor than you can with a straight face.

I am a black woman poet and I sound like one.

Even beyond sexuality, I'm generally interested in identity.

So one time when I was working in this motel one of the toilets leaked and I had to replace the flapper ball. Here's what it said on the package; I kept it till I knew it by heart: 'Please Note. Parts are included for all installations, but no installation requires all of the parts.' That's kind of my philosophy about men. I don't think there's an installation out there that could use all my parts.

I’m really not interested in women as victims. Look at me, I get the last laugh ‘cause I get to be funny about it.

It's weird the way "finger puppet" sounds okay as a noun... ladies.

Instead of trying to fit an impossible ideal, I took a personal inventory of all my healthy body parts for which I am grateful: Straight Greek eyebrows. They start at the hairline at my temple and, left unchecked, will grow straight across my face and onto yours.

Unlike my subject will I frame my song, It shall be witty and it shan't be long.

First name: Mister; middle name: period; last name T.

My face felt like my normal face, as if that part of me hadn’t transformed into a bird. [Fine, Sadie. Call me the Carter-headed chicken. Happy?]

I am a New Yorker, one; I'm an artist, two; I'm a woman, three.

I believe, firmly, that women are always right. Ah, I should actually rephrase that: I... don't.

Our own peculiar human condition is that we are as fit to be laughed at as able to laugh.

Unfortunately, I am not homosexual... In technical fact, I am humasexual. I am attracted to humans. But, of course, not many.

Pornography is a satire on human pretensions.

I became a stand-up comedienne because I had a sit-down husband.

Just looking at all the faces here reminds me of some of the great work that was done this year . . . by cosmetic surgeons.