Elayne Boosler Quotes

As a stand-up comic, you have to do the road.

My job is to go out and entertain the most people possible.

I do a lot of Vegas work and work with the comedians.

In France, Christmas is a family holiday. You stay home. New Year's Eve is when you go out.

To get a job where the only thing you have to do in your career is to make people laugh-well, it's the best job in the world.

I don't enjoy writing newspaper articles any more than people like reading them. I'm a standup comic, not a journalist, although sometimes onstage I will say: 'What else is in the news?' Writing is work, which I'm not comfortable with.

I'm not a jukebox; I don't play exactly what the crowd wants to hear - that doesn't make sense. But, I do look at people requests. At the end of the day, they are the ticket payers and they are the ones that come to the show. If I played music that purely entertains me, I'd play very weird music.

I would love to do Broadway the rest of my life! Because it's challenging, because it makes me grow as an actor, as an entertainer, as an artist, and that's what I need; that's what I'm hooked on.

Shooting is nothing. Anybody can shoot. The big charge is putting on a show for the crowd.

When I got a part in 'All American Girl,' in 1994, I remember thinking, 'Now I have a series, I'm not going to need to do standup,' but every night I'd go out afterward and get onstage somewhere.

For me, standup will always be some part of my life, and other things will move around and find their place.

When I'm up there, I'm just thinking that I've got to make them laugh or they won't show up next time.

I really love standup because it's something that I've been literally doing for 40 years, which means I'm a thousand years old.

Growing up, I didn't really watch a lot of standup. I didn't know you could be a low-energy comedian. It was something I did daydream about, but in the way you daydream about becoming the president or something - it could never happen.

I started standup at age nineteen. I decided that the only way I was going to try show business as a career was if I could make total strangers laugh.

I love show business. It's my life, honey, and I try to enjoy it.

I did a gig as a standup when I was eight years old. I went on holiday with my family to this holiday camp and they had a talent competition and I entered as a standup.

Showbiz works well when you give the audience what they want.

That's a nice thing about being a topical standup: you can add in things to keep it fresh.

You got your resolutions... We just got reservations.

Time is the school in which we learn.

It's always a job when you're the reason they're assembling. If you're just doing shows and you're on a lineup with eight other guys, it's fun, it's great.

I think that, for me, my favorite thing to do is perform standup onstage. Everything else I do is for the exposure to do more stand-up onstage, and for the money, and for the health insurance.

We're paid to care. That's what actors get their money for. But the main goal is not for the actors to be frustrated at the end of the show, but for the audience to be throwing their shoes at the television set. That's what we're trying for.

Anything that makes a noise is satisfactory to a crowd.