James Keller Quotes

What’s your name, lad?” “Newton. Newton Pulsifer.” “LUCIFER? What’s that you say? Are ye of the Spawn of Darkness, a tempting beguiling creature from the pit, wanton limbs steaming from the fleshpots of Hades, in tortured and lubricious thrall to your Stygian and hellish masters?” “That’s Pulsifer,” explained Newton. “With a P. I don’t know about the other stuff, but we come from Surrey.” The voice on the phone sounded vaguely disappointed.

A pun is the lowest form of humor—when you don't think of it first.

So I went in to a pet shop. I said, "Can I buy a goldfish?" The guy said, "Do you want an aquarium?" I said, "I don't care what star sign it is."

It is quite possible for the vulgar to be funny, but to succeed, it must rise to a certain genius.

Puns are the droppings of soaring wits.

You can be funny and say what you mean; these ideas are not mutually exclusive. Some of the best jokes came from people who meant it. See: Pryor, Bruce, Carlin, etc.

My way of joking is to tell the truth. That's the funniest joke in the world.

In my opinion, I think sarcasm and humor in a song, without turning it into a novelty song, is really charming.

Sometimes a witticism has no truth behind it.

George Carlin is brilliant with words, and Johnny Winters is very creative. It's taking something common and drawing out the humor, being clever with words.

Only the pun remains. The pun, beloved of Shakespeare, children and tabloid headline-writers, is normally eschewed in the modern, sophisticated circles in which I move.

I have a really dark, rich, thick sense of humor.

Puns are a form of humor with words.

Ever since I was a kid, I just loved those comedians on TV who would just have fun with the language.

My parents have always had a great sense of humor. And I really appreciate good humor in songs, witty lyrics that sneak up on you and then you listen again, and say: 'That's so funny.' John Prine's songs have always had this really witty tone.

Humor writing is something that comes naturally to me.

I'm a plethora of stolen jokes and kitschy references.

I have wit in my work and a sense of humor, but I do not use irony in any way.

Plus, I love comic writing. Nothing satisfies me more than finding a funny way to phrase something.

I think puns are not just the lowest form of wit, but the lowest form of human behavior.

Jerry Seinfeld is amazing in many ways, not the least of them his ability to find humor, and convincing us to find it, too, in the million-and-two details about modern life that under different circumstances might send us into paroxysms of rage.

Now the point of comedy is not just looking funny, it's use of language. We have at our disposal a great language... and the imaginative, creative use of that language can be at the service of humour.

Wit is the epitaph of an emotion.

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.

I can't not write funny. It's literally the only way I know how to do it.