wedding humor Quotes

A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.

Well what's in your Amazonian hope chest?

Never refer to your wedding night as the original amateur hour.

I should have suspected my husband was lazy. On our wedding day, his mother told me: "I'm not losing a son; I'm gaining a couch."

The groom always smiles proudly because he's convinced he's accomplished something quite wonderful. The bride smiles because she's been able to convince him of it.

Oh I don't mind going to weddings, just as long as it's not my own.

You might be a redneck if you had to remove a toothpick for wedding pictures.

I didn't have a big fat Greek wedding, but I have a lot of fat Greek friends.

The idea behind the tuxedo is the woman's point of view that men are all the same; so we might as well dress them that way. That's why a wedding is like the joining together of a beautiful, glowing bride and some guy. The tuxedo is a wedding safety device, created by women because they know that men are undependable. So in case the groom chickens out, everybody just takes one step over, and she marries the next guy.

You might be a redneck if you saved lots of money on your honeymoon by going deer hunting.

Well, what I mean is that I shouldn't mind being a bride at a wedding, if I could be one without having a husband.

I just want to let you know that when I look into my future, I see nothing but you.” That’s what Chaz had whispered in my ear at some point during the wedding last night. Then he’d whispered. “And you’re not even wearing Spanx.

When you hire a person to plan your wedding, this does not include securing the groom. Plan to get married on Friday the 13th. In years to come this will make it much easier to explain why things turned out badly. To look beautiful at your wedding, take time to plan it. It took me a long time to find two ugly bridesmaids and a frumpy little flower girl.

I was the best man at the wedding... If I'm the best man, why is she marrying him?