USA Today Quotes

I don't even read the papers. I read 'USA Today' because it has color photos.

Arnold Schwarzenegger's publicist told USA Today that the actor has not ruled out running for governor of California, saying that he will make a decision soon. Reportedly Arnold needs that time to learn how to pronounce 'gubernatorial.'

I have high hopes for Renee Ballard's literary life, and it can't start out better than the top of 'USA TODAY''s best-seller list.

If it's called THE USA Today, why is all the news from yesterday?

I worked on 'USA Today' as a topic for while. I tried to do something on hand chairs, chairs that look like hands. I really tried. But some topics are not truly universal.

I get my information from the Wall Street Journal, USA Today, and Fox News.

Actually, when I saw it in USA Today, I just, Candace Parker was, we were warming up in practice and she was underneath the basket shooting and I just said, 'Hey Candace! I enjoyed what I read in the paper today about your decision [to stay].' She just started laughing and I did too. So I haven't discussed it with her.

People read the papers not in the hopes of learning something new, but in the expectation of being told what they already know. This is a form of living death. Its apotheosis is the daily poll in USA Today, which informs us what percentage of a small number of unscientifically selected people called a toll number to vote on questions that cannot possibly be responded to with a yes or no.

Every time a U.S.A. Today slides underneath my door, it's like they're saying, 'Hey, you're not that smart, right?'

USA Today reports that the number of death row executions this year has hit a 35-year low. They attribute that to DNA evidence clearing more people and the fact that Rick Perry has been on the road campaigning.

USA Today hopes to serve as a forum for better understanding and unity to help make the USA truly one nation.

According to USA today, the average length of an attention span of a man in America is 23 minutes.

It says something about this new global economy that USA Today now reports every morning on the day's events in Asian markets.

I remember when I was a rookie, there was an article in 'USA Today' that said, 'Larry Bird, he's lost a step.' That night I went out to guard him, he scored, like, 47 on me.

U.S.A. Today is what happens when the coupon section takes over the newspaper.

USA Today has come out with a new survey - apparently, three out of every four people make up 75% of the population.

I was on the cover of a lot of newspapers. I was on the cover of USA Today for every single day for a month. I was on the masthead, so I tend to get recognized a lot, and in weird places. It's always flattering, and it's always odd. It's always at the worst possible time.

In the New York Times, you're going to get completely different information than you would in the USA Today.

Even the weather page is in a state of moral decay. What?s wrong with red, white and blue, USA Today? This rainbow weather map is just another example of the homometerological agenda.

'USA Today' once did a big article called, 'Who said it? Was it Norm or George Bush?' They had quotes of mine and quotes of his, and they went to some congressmen and senators and said, 'Who said it?' It was hysterical.