Dane Cook Quotes

Expensive gear helps for night shots, but I wouldn't recommend beginners overspend on a camera.

To young men contemplating a voyage I would say go.

The impulse to travel is one of the hopeful symptoms of life.

My fear of flying starts as soon as I buckle myself in and then the guy up front mumbles a few unintelligible words then before I know it I'm thrust into the back of my seat by acceleration that seems way too fast and the rest of the trip is an endless nightmare of turbulence, of near misses. And then the cabbie drops me off at the airport.

Hey, people who travel with their bed pillow. You look insane.

You want to know what it's like to be on a plane for 22 hours? Sit in a chair, squeeze your head as hard as you can, don't stop, then take a paper bag and put it over your mouth and nose and breath your own air over and over and over.

Kilometers are shorter than miles. Save gas, take your next trip in kilometers.

Travel far enough, you meet yourself.

Jet lag is for amateurs.

Our happiest moments as tourists always seem to come when we stumble upon one thing while in pursuit of something else.

I can't think of anything that excites a greater sense of childlike wonder than to be in a country where you are ignorant of almost everything.

People come back from flights and tell you a story like it's a horror story. That's how bad they make it sound. They're like, 'It was the worst day of my life. We didn't board for 20 minutes and they made us sit there on the runway for 40 minutes.' Oh really? What happened next? Did you fly in the air, incredibly, like a bird? Did you partake in the miracle of human flight you non-contributing zero?'

It can hardly be a coincidence that no language on earth has ever produced the expression, 'As pretty as an airport.

Shigure: "What's in the camera? Huh? Huh? What is it?" Hatori: "Quiet, you hack.

To many people holidays are not voyages of discovery, but a ritual of reassurance.

Some years ago - never mind how long precisely - having little or no money in my purse, and nothing particular to interest me on shore, I thought I would sail about a little and see the watery part of the world.

The reason so few people are successful is no one has yet found a way for someone to sit down and slide uphill.

Some old women and men grow bitter with age; the more their teeth drop out, the more biting they get.

Never trust anything you read in a travel article. Travel articles appear in publications that sell large, expensive advertisements to tourism-related industries, and these industries do not wish to see articles with headlines like: URUGUAY: DON'T BOTHER.

It was the coldest winter ever! I thought last winter was the coldest winter ever, but I was wrong now wasn't I? You see because I travel all the time. So last winter, I'd be in the midwest, and the blizzard would hit. And then I'd fly home, and the blizzard would hit again!

Live, travel, adventure, bless, and don't be sorry.

Everyone knows what a hypocrite is. That's the guy who gripes about the sex, violence and nudity on his VCR.

The man who would be fully employed should procure a ship or a woman, for no two things produce more trouble.

So, I travel a lot. I hate traveling, mostly 'cause my dad used to beat me with a globe.

I travel with a boom box. When I get on a plane, I stuff the power cord for the boom box into the battery compartment. From an outsider's point of view, it looks like I've got it all wrong.