Phyllis Diller Quotes

When I wasn't the flavor of the week or month or day, those were hard times.

I didn't play with other children.

I can remember getting rejected systematically by casting directors as a young kid. I felt like the biggest outsider there ever was; that I'd never belong in that club.

I was always the kid dribbling the ball on the sidelines, hoping someone would pick me. I'd go with my older brother to the gym or park, and when I went out there, I'd pass the ball so I could get picked again.

Johnny, can't you come out to play in your empty garden?

When you don't have love, it's like there's a party going on, and everybody was invited, except for you. And you just happened to be walking by that house in the rain...

I'm just a big boy, I'm still just playing cowboys and Indians and astronaut and baseball player and all that stuff that I used to play as a kid.

We are a most solitary people, and we live, repelled by one another, in the gray, outcast cities of Cain.

I don't care if your world is ending today because I wasn't invited to it anyway.

When I was little, I spent a lot of time by myself. When other kids were in school, I was skiing and thinking about things. I was alone on the mountain.

The dog approached again, cautiously. I found the bologna sandwich, ripped off a chunk, wiped the cheap watery mustard off, then placed it on the sidewalk. The dog walked up to the bit of sandwich, put his nose to it, sniffed, then turned and walked off. This time he didn't look back. He accelerated down the street. No wonder I had been depressed all my life. I wasn't getting proper nourishment.

I felt like an alien. I always felt like I never belonged to any group that I wanted to belong to.

One small cloud, cast out by the herd, limps away to the west.

Every now and then, I’d meet a guy and think that we were getting along great, and suddenly I’d stop hearing from him. Not only did he stop calling, but if I happened to bump into him sometime later he always acted like I had the plague. I didn’t understand it. I still don’t. And it bothered me. It hurt me. With time, it got harder and harder to keep blaming the guys, and I eventually came to the conclusion that there was something wrong with me. That maybe I was simply meant to live my life alone.

When I was a kid I got no respect. I had no friends. I remember the see-saw. I had to keep runnin' from one end to the other.

Loneliness comes in two basic varieties. When it results from a desire for solitude, loneliness is a door we close against the world. When the world instead rejects us, loneliness is an open door, unused.

When I'm 70 I might be a man in a park just wandering around, speaking in tongues with kids throwing bread at me.

Everyone in life knows what it's like to be picked on and to feel like an outsider.

Other people are occupied, I alone am unwilling, like the outcast.

It was like when we were little kids and we played games on the ivy-covered hillside in the backyard. We were warriors and wizards and angels and high elves and that was our reality. If someone said, Isn’t it cute, look at them playing, we would have smiled back, humoring them, but it wasn’t playing. It was transformation. It was our own world. Our own rules.

I was the green monkey, the pariah. And I had no friends. Not just a few friends, or one good friend, or grudging acceptance by other misfits and outcasts. I was alone. All stinking alone, without even an imaginary playmate.

I just feel kind of out of place on Easter. I feel kind of useless because everybody else has kids and I don't and I'm just standing there with nothing to do.

It’s okay. I’m used to people not wanting me at their parties.” I pushed to my feet. The stars seemed to twirl a bit with the movement. “No big deal.

It's like going out to the desert and screaming and then having little kids throw their sandbox at you. I'm only 24.