Josh Billings Quotes

I think I lie way too much to even know what I've lied about.

There are two ways of lying. One, not telling the truth and the other, making up statistics.

Exaggeration is a blood relation to falsehood and nearly as blamable.

It is perhaps being economical with the truth.

There wasn't any more truth in over half of what any so-called orator said. If it wasn't a Deliberate Lie, why it was an Exaggerated Falsehood.

I'm the most terrific liar you ever saw in your life. It's awful. If I'm on my way to the store to buy a magazine, even, and somebody asks me where I'm going, I'm liable to say I'm going to the opera. It's terrible.

Men lie the most. Men lie all the time.

Men are liars. We'll lie about lying if we have to. I'm an algebra liar. I figure two good lies make a positive.

I can't say why people lie; they just do. Everyone has their own reasons for not telling the truth.

If one is to be called a liar, one may as well make an effort to deserve the name.

I suppose I shouldn't go around admitting I speak untruths on the radio.

Well, the truth is that a lot of people lie about their health, they lie about the finances, they lie about things at work, they lie about things.

I couldn't tell the truth if my life depended on it.

Liars need to have good memories.

To be a liar, you've got to have a great memory, and I don't have a memory.

The certainty with which Cameron informed MPs and Shadow ministers of the specifics of a Labour offer that never actually existed suggests a degree of flexibility with the truth.

If you're lying, you're lying.

If an eloquent speaker speak not the truth, is there a more horrid kind of object in creation?

I'm more of an exaggerator than a liar.

I do not mind lying, but I hate inaccuracy.

Why would anyone lie? The truth is always more colorful.

I'm a really bad liar.

The average person tells a few white lies.

A good portion of speaking will consist in knowing how to lie.

I don't like being lied to.