David Letterman Quotes

The one and only time I met Pope Benedict XVI was when he was Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger.

'Community' is a comedy show, and one of the characters happens to be a Christian. I do think they have been very careful to make sure everyone is the butt of the joke for various reasons.

I can't stay mad at Pope Frank. I just can't. It's a funny situation that I like the pope and Mel Gibson doesn't.

We had a picture of the pope and President [J.F.] Kennedy on top of the television.

The trouble with [President William Howard] Taft is that if he were Pope he would think it necessary to appoint a few Protestant cardinals.

Mr. Greene. Some parts of your book are certain to offend some Catholics, but you should pay no attention to that.

I am amazed that the Pope gave an audience to such a degenerate. [Martin Luther King Jr.]

Pope John Paul II was a man of peace, a friend of the Jewish nation... and worked for the historic reconciliation between the nations and for the renewal of diplomatic ties between Israel and the Vatican at the end of 1993.

It is difficult to convey the excitement I first felt when it was revealed that His Holiness Pope Francis was invited to Washington D.C. to address the world from the floor of the House of Representatives.

When I did 'Spamalot,' the joke was that I was a foot taller than Tim Curry.

The Book of Mormon is chloroform in print.

I would like to see the Pope wearing my T-shirt.

I'm so, so thrilled that [Pope Francis] is there at this crucial moment in the history of our world.

[Pope Francis ] is taken a selfie!He's a tremendous breath of fresh air.

The holy father John Paul II made a profound impact wherever he went. And, of course, his trip to Boston was one of the earliest ones. But I must say every time that I met the holy father and mentioned Boston, he would immediately say, rain. So, it made quite an impact on him, too.

I'm really encouraged by Pope Francis, because I think his attitude is totally laudable.

Jesus was a brilliant Jewish stand-up comedian, a phenomenal improviser. His parables are great one-liners.

For many people, the pope is still, to a certain extent, a positive role model and a moral force, although others feel that this aspect has suffered greatly.

Today in Sri Lanka, Pope Francis visited a Buddhist temple. When asked why, the Pope said, 'Just keeping my options open. It's a dicey job market. You never know.'

God does not hate gay people. He's just mad because they found a loophole in His system.

I think “The Book of Mormon” has made that difference in its field. It changed the game. It’s something that 20 years from now people will still be talking about, hopefully. That’s my goal as an artist, as a creator, as a work for hire, is to choose projects that make people think, make people talk, and make people interested in having a dialogue.

Has the pope questioned the faith of any communist leaders? He spends a lot of time in communist countries.

Pope Francis is going to go to Washington, D.C., to address Congress. He believes the New England Patriots have been deflating his giant hat.

Of publishing a book on religion, my dear sir, I never had an idea. I should as soon think of writing for the reformation of Bedlam, as of the world of religious sects. Of these there must be, at least, ten thousand, every individual of every one of which believes all wrong but his own.

The pope has been called many things, historic figure, spiritual leader, moral force. But a growing chorus of voices has begun to refer to him as John Paul II the Great, in other words, as a saint.