Jim Gaffigan Quotes

To remove all credibility from what you're saying try wearing sunglasses on your forehead.

I had pecs for about two days. Everyone would hate me. Just look at me walking around with my little peacoat on. My little customized pea coat.

Thank you for making me nouveau riche.

Optimism isn't funny unless you are laughing at the person, whereas extreme pessimism is extremely funny. It's exaggeration.

The best way to make the most serious point in the world is to be as unserious as possible.

I've always thought something that makes you laugh, it makes you laugh because there's a little bit of truth to it.

Comedically, unpleasantness is great fun.

I'm superstitious... but not like wear the same underwear for two weeks superstitious.

Everything is ironic to me. There are moments I find hysterical, but I'm probably the only one who would find that, except for a few people.

No subject is unsuitable for comedy.

A sitcom isn't usually the right tool for satire.

Fools are my theme, let satire be my song.

Everything can be satirized.

Satire is fascinating stuff. It's deadly serious, and when politics begin to break down, there is a drift towards satire, because it's the only thing that makes any sense.

Politics is much too serious to be taken too seriously; equally, there are many aspects of it so laughable as to be lamentable.

Humor is everywhere in that there's irony in just about anything a human does.

I'm just trying to portray what I find ironic or humorous.

I once knew a chap who had a system of just hanging the baby on the clothes line to dry and he was greatly admired by his fellow citizens for having discovered a wonderful innovation on changing a diaper.

The love of truth lies at the root of much humor.

I have a fine sense of the ridiculous, but no sense of humor.

When things get so absurd and so stupid and so ridiculous that you just can't bear it, you cannot help but turn everything into a joke.

I haven't watched 'Mad TV' a lot, but I have seen some stuff on there that is truly funny. You have to have some sort of attitude toward the subject, and they seem to have it. It depends on how much blood you want to draw.

If you're going to get into social criticism with absurdity and satire, you can't be politically correct when you do that.

My life has been one great big joke, a dance that's walked a song that's spoke, I laugh so hard I almost choke when I think about myself.

If nothing is serious anymore, then there's nothing to satirize.