Robert A. Heinlein Quotes

Don't try to teach a pig to sing. It doesn't work, and it annoys the pig.

The insistence on a perfect cure often results in no betterment whatsoever.

It offends me when people do useless work.

Don't waste my time- I'm not stupid, and I'm not gullible.

Don't you hate when people are late to work. And they always have the worst excuses. "Oh, I'm sorry I'm late, traffic." "Traffic, huh? How do you think I got here; helicoptered in!?"

If you want reality to be different than it is, you might as well try to teach a cat to bark.

If you are patient...and wait long enough...Nothing will happen

I'd rather not deal with such questions, because anyway it's like shearing a pig - lots of screams but little wool.

I always call niggas fools for wanting to learn the hard way. When I'm really the fool for tryna teach 'em. When the blinds leading the blind. You can't reach 'em. If niggas ain't as hungry as you then why feed 'em? Niggas ain't tryna be lead then why lead 'em? Having big problems with your dogs, why breed em?

Lost time is like a run in a stocking. It always gets worse.

The thing I lose patience with the most is the clock. Its hands move too fast

The greatest thief this world has ever produced is procrastination, and he is still at large.

Never argue with a pedant over nomenclature. It wastes your time and annoys the pedant.

I'm a mumbler. If I'm walking with a friend, and I say something, he says, "What?" So I say it again, and he says, "What?" Really, it's just some insignificant stuff I'm saying, but now I'm yelling, "That tree is far away!"

It is the act of a madman to pursue impossibilities .

Most people fail in life because they major in minor things.

Einstein wrote that insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting a different result. That said, is it crazier to repeatedly throw yourself against a window, or to repeatedly open that window, believing the creatures that are throwing themselves against it might come into your house, take a look around, and leave with no hard feelings?

A good example is the best sermon.

So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.

LECTURER, n. One with his hand in your pocket, his tongue in your ear and his faith in your patience.

I think that all good, right thinking people in this country are sick and tired of being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being told that all good, right thinking people in this country are fed up with being sick and tired. I'm certainly not, and I'm sick and tired of being told that I am.

Time is a precious thing. Never waste it.

I cut my own hair. I got sick of barbers because they talk too much. And too much of their talk was about my hair coming out.

I'm in a situation with this girl that's as hopeless as overthrowing the Bush administration.