Zach Galifianakis Quotes

I'm a big fan of reality shows. I thought the first one, Dukes of Hazzard, captured white people perfectly.

New white people, you can't scare these white people, I tried.

I'm just happy our nations are on the same page of keeping shitty reality TV on the air. Small world!

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

Well, I had to do it becasue somebody had to do something becasue, you know, black people are killing white people every day on teh streets, and they rape white women, 100 white women a day.

I say stupid white men are always the problem. That's never going to change.

'Dear White People' started a conversation about race. It's such a difficult thing to talk about, especially in America because of our history. I love that you can confront it with humour and with satire.

I had no expectations of white people at all.

'Get Out,' of course, is the surprise hit movie that Peele wrote and directed about a black man named Chris, who discovers that his white girlfriend's family is running a nasty racist conspiracy.

I've gotten in trouble with every race you can imagine. They say, 'I can't believe you talked about this - you're racist.' And I say, 'How can I be racist? Isn't racism exclusionary? If all of you are offended, that means I'm including every race in my jokes.'

I think it's funny when stereotypes happen.

One thing I'm not doing in my older age is explaining myself to culturally clueless white people.

I don't understand why black people feel this undying need to want to be down with white people all the time.

I do not claim to be an expert on race in America.

I was about four years old the first time I ever saw what happened when you acted up to whites.

Behind every racist joke is a scientific fact.

The racial dynamics over here are fraught. White supremacy is overt. It's the reason I don't want to raise my kids here.

It's much easier to talk about racism when you're able to use mutants as a metaphor. People would much rather talk about Charles Xavier and Magneto than they would about Martin Luther King or Malcolm X.

I think we are aware that post-racialism isn't real, right? I mean, I hope so. I kind of joke that we're post-post-racial.

Sometimes if I really want to get someone's attention, I'll start a sentence with something like, "I'm not racist, but..." I say, "I'm not racist, but you look great today." They say, "That wasn't racist at all." I said, "I know. I said I'm not racist. You never listen. Typical Mexican."

Everybody blames the Jews for killing Christ, and the Jews try to pass it off on the Romans. I'm one of the few people who believes it was the blacks.

Why hate someone for the color of their skin when there are much better reasons to hate them?

Archie Bunker used to call me 'the laziest white kid he'd ever met.'

He musta thought it was white boy day. It ain't white boy day, is it?

There is nothing more painful to me at this stage in my life than to walk down the street and hear footsteps... then look around and see somebody white and feel relieved.