George Carlin Quotes

If you like playing basketball, you play basketball. If you like playing golf, you play golf.

You don't think anything about age when you're playing [golf]. I mean, why would you ever think about that.

[On golf:] One of the most distressing defects of civilization.

You know what the game of golf is, don't you? It's basketball for people who can't jump and chess for people who can't think.

I don't think I've ever held a racket in my hand ... There's got to be somebody in the US who isn't trying to play tennis and stinking up the court.

How about a little noise. How do you expect a man to putt?

But we do have a golf course near by and I play fairly regularly.

Lots of people still don't think of golf as a sport.

Tennis and golf are best played, not watched.

Golf is so popular simply because it is the best game in the world at which to be bad.

You worked your paper route, mowed the lawn, then played golf all day.

Jimmy Fallon and I play regularly at the Bayonne Golf Club in Jersey. He's eighteen holes of fun. Any time we play he has moments of brilliance, but also moments of utter catastrophe.

Golf is hugely important, as it keeps me going.

Sports are my favorite. It's the first thing I turn to every day.

I can't think of a better way to spend a morning with somebody than riding around a golf course, letting 'em win.

Everyone thinks if they have a problem, the first thing they want to do is play football and enjoy themselves.

I just love hanging out with good company on a great, fun golf course.

In Argentina, I trained in the mornings, and I played a lot of golf.

Golf is a good time, valued time.

Enjoy the game. Happy golf is good golf.

I don't have many hobbies. If I think of hobbies, maybe ping pong. But I don't have a desire to get a ping pong medal.

I suppose I could think of a lot of things to say about the fact that I still play. But I don't really need to. I can tell you this, that I enjoy it. I still enjoy it. I like to get out in the air and I like to walk and I like to do the things that are involved in playing golf.

Golf: The most ... perfect expression of National Stupidity.

Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

I can sum it up like this: Thank God for the game of golf.