Andrew Dice Clay Quotes

I'm not a politician, I'm a comedian. I know my limitations.

I knew already when I was seven years old, that I wanted to be on stage and entertain people. I sell laughs. Here, you got one for free!

Theres always next year, ... except, you know, for Ray Romano.

I feel more comfortable in comedy.

If you call me a comedian I will be very grateful. I will thank you profoundly. No, I love doing comedy. It's fun once in a while to do a serious part but I really enjoy doing comedy because I love to laugh.

I just want to continue to do comedy. Comedy, I'm discovering, is my niche. It's what I'm born to do, so I would love to have my own sitcom one day in the future.

I'm not a comedian. I'm Lenny Bruce.

It's a lot easier to say you're a comic than a performance artist.

I love comedy. I like to think that there's a sense of humor in some of my music - obviously not all of it.

Comedy pays the bills if I can't find a film.

I think anybody in front of a crowd is a comedian.

If I had a choice, I would do comedy all the time. It's just the most challenging thing. To make someone laugh is the most challenging thing, and the most rewarding thing, in entertainment.

Comedy is not pretty.

I actually enjoy comedy; it's a lot of fun.

I was 23 with a mullet doing lots of jerk-off material.I can't look at the old tapes now.

In my mind, I'm hilarious, so I would love to do some comedy. But, I'm not exactly sure my perspective is a healthy one.

I consider myself a sit-down comedian really, as much as anything else. I love comedy. Life is a cosmic joke.

By the way, to perform in front of Don Rickles, it 's not nerve-wrecking. It 's enjoyable, i am enjoying Jeff Garlin. I hope I perform in front of Don Rickles every night of my life !

I do love comedy, but I'm not brave enough to tackle a script whose goal is to make you laugh. That's tough. The ones that can do it, I tip my hat off to them, but I don't have that kind of humor or mind.

I am a comedian: that means I laugh at things other people don't laugh at and also annoys my wife sometimes.

I don't have to write jokes. I don't have to write insults. If you ask the man of the hour in the hot seat, my mere existence is clearly insult enough.

There's [John Mulaney Show] jokes that I have in stand up that I wouldn't try to put in, I would try to have someone just speak extemporaneously in the middle of a scene about an episode of "Law and Order" or something.

You’re so hilarious. You know, if this whole Daimon-slaying gig doesn’t work out for you, you should really consider being a comedian. The bright Barney hair color would just add to the overall entertainment factor.

I'd like to do more comedy, but i think my forte is still in the heavy. I'd love to do a comic lead, a musical.

I remember seeing Eddie Murphy RAW and seeing people laughing and having a good time and that was the same response I was getting so I thought I was on to something.