Bill Maher Quotes

I don't mind most religious people, I talk to them. I listen to them, you know, banging on. "I prayed very hard and then the fairy came." "Did he? Good. Have a biscuit." I only get annoyed when they try and make me see the fairy. "You have to let the fairy into your heart." Look, I wouldn't let him into my garden, okay? I'd shoot him on sight, if he existed, which he doesn't. Now have another biccie and be quiet, will you please?

Religion is "so absurd that it comes close to imbecility."

I am an atheist... I don't understand religion at all. I'm sure I'll offend a lot of people by saying this, but I think it's all nonsense.

Organized religion is a sham and a crutch for weak-minded people

I believe that religion, generally speaking, has been a curse to mankind.

I mostly hate organized religion, which I think is a force for the oppression of women and creates warfare.

I used to hate religion, I loathed it in my angry days.

Religion is not a nice thing. It is potentially a very dangerous thing because it involves a heady complex of emotions, desires, yearnings and fears.

When you say you don't get religion, you're just saying that you don't get organized religion.

Just for being a religion at all you're as complicit as the rest in the retardation of the human intellectual progress.

I think religion is a funny thing because, when you see somebody who can really break it down, sometimes it feels foolish what you believe.

Religion (is) a universal obsessional neurosis.

My father hates organized religion, probably because he hates the God who killed his little girl back in 1968. I find religions variously bemusing.

All religions are both harmful and untrue.

All religions are ancient monuments to superstition, ignorance and ferocity.

Religion is simply art bastardized out of all recognition.

Religion makes intelligent people say and do wacky things, believe and affirm crazy things.

I don't think I've ever prayed in my entire life, never sat and had an imaginary chat with God.

These religions that are so freighted with their own pomposity are no better than inspired guesses.

Religion! but for thee, prolific fiend, Who peoplest earth with demons, hell with men, And heaven with slaves!

For me, religion is serious business - a farrago of authoritarian nonsense, misogyny and humble pie, the eternal enemy of human happiness and freedom.

I'm atheist because religion is a crutch, and only the crippled need crutches. I can get around perfectly well on my own two feet, and so can everyone else with a backbone and a grain of common sense.

Religion [is] the universal obsessional neurosis of humanity

I think religion might throw up a kind of resistance, but I think if one talks about conditioning we can all kind of understand that.

Religion is for followers... Followers and puppets.