Daniel Tosh Quotes

A society needs famous people; the question is whom it chooses for that role. Any criticism of its choice is by implication a criticism of that society.

Why does everyone think they need to be a star? It's ridiculous. The celebrity culture is so silly, and the fact that people grow up thinking that it's something to aspire to just seems wrong. I don't mean to bash my life. I love my life; I just think it's not the only way to go.

I was hiding out from the celebrity thing, I was smoking way too much [marijuana].

In a country that doesn't discriminate between fame and infamy, the latter presents itself as plainly more achievable.

We are constantly consuming entertainment; we treat celebrities like role models and royalty. Sometimes destructive behavior gets ignored, or sometimes the pressure breaks them.

My father never got films to our dinner table. It was never the case with us as well that our father works in films, and we know so many actors. It was like him going to work like any other father. In fact, my school friends would ask me if I have met a certain actor, and I would tell them that I haven't, which they found strange.

I never want people to know who I'm going out with or about my family. But it's difficult, because when people have seen you online since you were 14, they feel like they know you.

If you look at the role models that are out there, the women that tend to be photographed tend to be actresses and models, whereas the men are often in the media because of what they do in terms of business and sport.

Although I'm sure she's completely charming and delightful, I'm not sure if Kate Middleton might be the best role model. This is a person who has got where she is by marriage, a person whose weight, clothing, hair we worry about - we don't worry about what she's thinking.

I should have realized that what's good for movie stars doesn't work for a Cabinet secretary's wife.

People always meet me and go, 'You're so much cooler than I thought you'd be,' and I'm like, 'What did you expect me to be like?'

I don't think we know who a lot of these athletes are. We think we do, but they're never allowed to be themselves. Because the minute they try, people are saying, What's wrong with him? Why is he drawing attention to himself?

The only effect that I ever noticed from smoking marijuana was a sort of mild sedative, a release of tension when I was overworking. It never made me boisterous of quarrelsome. If anything, it calmed me and reduced my activity.

George Clooney is a wonderful philanthropist. But I've heard regular people say, "Would he just shut up and be hot?"

I think people think celebrities get babies really easily, like Angelina Jolie, but they don't hear about the ones who aren't successful because we don't like talking about it, it's too painful.

In my 20s I was so ignorant about drugs, and so naive. I mean, my band was smoking marijuana for years; I didn't even know what a joint was. And I'd never seen a line of cocaine in my life. And I don't know whether it was bravado or - OK, I'll join in. But my stupidity, I had a line of coke, and that started the whole process.

I told [reporters] that I sprinkled marijuana on my organic buckwheat pancakes, and then when I ran my five miles to the ballpark, it made me impervious to the bus fumes. That's when [Baseball Commissioner] Bowie Kuhn took me off his Christmas list.

Relax and take notes while I take tokes of the marijuana smoke

I'm no expert in what country artists go through or how country audiences would react, but I'll say that the work I did to put myself in Will Lexington's shoes absolutely led me to believe that it would ruin his career. Meanwhile, I was getting lots of supportive messages saying, "Will Lexington should just come out! It's 2015 already, audiences are going to embrace it!"

I don't know what my assistant would do besides get me pot.

When you consider America, there are hundreds of millions of people who have smoked marijuana illegally.

I have a reputation for giving unpopular answers at Democratic debates. I never used marijuana. Sorry!

I don't really look at celebrities as role models - I just don't see them like that. I guess it's because I'm in that world so I know that no one is perfect.

People are unbelievably giving and caring and understanding of me because of what I do for a living and because actors tend to get their asses kissed everywhere they go, so I can be extra-understanding in a relationship.