Robert Pattinson Quotes

I'm a terrible dancer. The worst.

I'm not very funny!

I grew up as a very sarcastic person. I was always the class clown, and to date girls, I had to be really funny. I was really skinny growing up. I was so thin, I had to run around in the shower to get wet. That kind of thin. So I always had to rely on humor and sarcasm.

I made sure that instead of people making fun of me, like every comedian probably says, I made fun of myself first so they would get distracted and just laugh. I was pretty brutally picked on for a while growing up. It was always the really pretty girls, the hot girls and then there was me. So I had to do something to get any sort of attention.

At school I was very shy and coincidentally inherited the title 'little miss worry guts,' and that was just among the staff. I learned early on that I could make people laugh, and as my small neat body betrayed me by growing to dizzying heights, I used it as a tool that translated into complete slap-stick comedy.

I'm just not very funny.

I'm kind of a nerd. A square. And I'm terrible at telling jokes. I always forget the punch line.

Yeah, it’s me, but I like to think I looked better when we met. ‘Cause right now, I’m pretty much hogging all the ugly. (Nick)

I knew at the time my haircut was pretty damn god-awful, so I was just hoping that I wasn't one of the joke ones. And they put me through to Hollywood and I thought, "Well okay, maybe I'm still one of the joke ones but at least I'm not terrible?"

Her friends say she is very funny. At a family dinner, she stood to go, and the footman very properly pulled her chair away. At that moment I asked her a question and she sat down again, except there was no chair. Everyone, including the Queen, laughed and laughed.

Mere bashfulness without merit is awkwardness.

I always thought I was sort of awkward and goofy-looking. I'm still kind of gangly.

I'm not really a pick-up-line guy. I don't know what I do.

I'm very self-conscious having my picture taken, so I clown around. My driver's license photo looks like a blonde Elvis.

When I meet a girl, I just sort of do really over-exaggerated terrible dance moves... a lot of hip movements. I get them laughing, and get them to feel pity for me, and then they like me!

It's hard to lead a cavalry charge if you think you look funny on a horse.

I feel like every day of my life is a funny wardrobe malfunction!

People think I have an interesting walk. Hell, I'm just trying to hold my gut in.

I don't think I'm funny.

I imagine how hard it might be to walk down the runway. Me in heels is, like, deforesting the forest, knocking trees, completely 'timber!'

I still get a little nervous when talking to girls. Which is awful, and embarrassing, because I feel like I shouldn't.

I spent every day just praying that I didn't look like a big dork on camera.

I don't know any jokes, which is embarrassing. I wish I did.

The only way I could get comfortable around people was to make them laugh. I was an obedient girl, and humor was my one form of rebellion. I used comedy to deflect. Like, 'Hey, check out my zit!' - you know, making fun of yourself before someone else has a chance to.

When I was 13, I was in my tent at Girl Scout camp, trying to change out of my bathing suit and talking at the same time. I fell out of the tent in front of everyone with my bathing suit around my ankles. I was humiliated - but no amount of humiliation has ever seemed to stop me.