Joseph Heller Quotes

Hee that hath a wife and children wants not businesse.

That is the really great thing about being an adult male, once you get married and have children the whole decision-making process is taken out of your hands, and I for one am extremely grateful.

A woman’s good goes to her husband and her bad to her kin.

I hate married men. They never make any sacrifices to the arts, but are always thinking of their duties to their wives and families or some rubbish of that sort.

When I was young, I was clever enough to know that if I got married or had children, I would be eaten.

You don't get to pick your partners in families; you get assigned a seat at the table.

A good wife is someone who thinks she has done everything right: raising the kids, being there for the husband, being home, trying to do it all.

I got a family I got to answer to. I got kids... my older parents and my preachers and everybody.

If I had no family, my wife and I would lead a much more romantic and nomadic existence.

My wife Jenny and I have four young children of our own.

Obviously, having a wife and a daughter is a huge responsibility.

Being a mother and wife are big roles.

... wife and children are a kind of discipline of humanity.

He that hath a wife and children hath given hostages to fortune.

I'm not saying to be happy you must be married. Nor am I saying that to be happy you need children. I'm saying that if you opt for children - be you man or woman - you have to take care of them.

Rearing a family is probably the most difficult job in the world. It resembles two business firms merging their respective resources to make a single product. All the potential headaches of that operation are present when an adult male and an adult female join to steer a child from infancy to adulthood.

People get into relationships. They get married and have kids, and all of a sudden, you can't just pick up and go get coffee, or go away for the weekend together, or go to a costume party together. It becomes a thing you have to plan.

She has very strong ideas about family - ideas that probably sound kind of sexist to you. She believes all dhampirs should train and put in time as guardians, but that the women should eventually return home to raise their children together. But not the men? No, he said wryly. She thinks men still need to stay out there and kill Strigoi.

[Children] would have messed up my apartment. In the main, they are ungrateful. They would have siphoned too much time away from the writing of my precious books.

Parents are untamed, excessive, potentially troublesome creatures; charming to be with for a time, in the main they must lead their own lives, independent and self-employed, with companions of their own age and selection.

When you marry someone, you marry their entire family.

In taking out an insurance policy one pays for it in dollars and cents, always at liberty to discontinue payments. If, however, womans premium is a husband, she pays for it with her name, her privacy, her self-respect, her very life, until death doth part.

If every man was as true to his country as he was to his wife, we'd be in a lot of trouble.

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases.

They came to her, naturally, since she was a woman, all day long with this and that; one wanting this, another that; the children were growing up; she often felt she was nothing but a sponge sopped full of human emotions.