Tommy Bolt Quotes

Golf is a game that is played on a five-inch course

On a real course, I'd probably want to throw my club in the water if I hit a duff shot. I'll give golf a miss - it's definitely not my sport.

Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an ever smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose

Golf - a young man's vice and an old man's penance.

Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat until the ball is in the hole. Have fun. The end.

Golf is an exercise in Scottish pointlessness for people who are no longer able to throw telephone poles at each other.

Playing golf is like chasing a quinine pill around a cow pasture.

I've always tried to play golf with a golf club. I have a hard time driving with my rifle. I mean, 18 is really narrow ... I have no problem with the course, except for the tee shot on 18.

Golf is a game that needlessly prolongs the lives of some of our most useless citizens.

Golf combines two favorite American pastimes: taking long walks and hitting things with a stick.

Men capable of governing empires fail to control a small white ball, which presents no difficulties whetever to others with one ounce more brain than a cuckoo clock. I wish to goodness I knew the man who invented this infernal game. I'd strangle him. But I suppose he's been dead for ages. Still, I could go and jump on his grave.

Sometimes, I play a round of extremely poor golf.

I found golf was too time consuming, but I did enjoy it.

I don't fear death, but I sure don't like those three-footers for par.

Golf is an indispensable adjunct to high civilisation.

Golf is the art of driving hard, avoiding the rough, surmounting traps and hazards, aiming straight, and arriving on the green at last, only to end up in a hole in the ground before your companions. The favored pastime of businessmen and their cronies, probably without a full appreciation of its metaphorical implications.

Golf is a lot of walking, broken up by disappointment and bad arithmetic.

[On golf:] One of the most distressing defects of civilization.

Golf is the most fun you can have with out taking your clothes off.

Golf is the Great Mystery. Like some capricous goddess, it bestows its favours with what would appear an almost fat-headed lack of method and discrimination. On every side we see big two-fisted he-men floundering round in three figures, stopping every few minutes to let through little shrimps with knock-knees and hollow cheeks, who are tearing up snappy seventy-fours.

I like golf because you can be really terrible at it, and still not look much dorkier than anybody else.

[Golfers] are a special kind of moral realist who nips the normal romantic and idealistic yearnings in the bud by proving once or twice a week that life is unconquerable but endurable.

All my life, I've been trying to make a hole-in-one. The closest I've come is a bogey.

Golf is a weird sport. Some days you got it. Some days you don't.