Matthew Quick Quotes

My father hated radio and could not wait for television to be invented so he could hate that too.

I don't like spinach, and I'm glad I don't, because if I liked it I'd eat it, and I just hate it.

A comedian's a comedian. They're a very kind of cynical bunch. I guess that's why I like them.

I never met a man I didn't like until I met Will Rogers.

I'm not a particularly shiny, happy person. I'm fairly cynical, and that's what draws me to comedy.

Say, the next time I see you, remind me not to talk to you, will you?

I'm leaving because the weather is too good. I hate London when it's not raining.

I'm such a hater, and will hate on anything.

Nobody's impressed back home. All my friends were going, 'Oh right, so you're doing a play up in Leeds? Another depressing one is it? Do you mind if we don't bother coming?' I love that.

I expected something a little more castle-shaped," said Jamie. Nothing lasts forever," Nick said. "Except demons, of course." Has anyone ever told you that you're a charming conversationalist?" Jamie asked. No," Nick replied honestly. I cannot tell you how much that surprises me," Jamie told him, and Nick gave him a half smile.

Can't we be friends?' I hate your guts, Frankovitch' Can't our guts be friends?

Superheroes? In New York? Give me a break!

Goodwin scowled at her cup. "With all due respect, my lord, I hate it when you make sense.

When I was in Vegas women were throwing their hotel keys at me. But it was after they checked out.

I think it's fun to love-to-hate people.

Why do I hate people? Who else is there to hate?

Don't wake me for the end of the world unless it has very good special effects.

The Schnauzer listens to jazz. I listen to jazz because he likes it, and I have even gone to jazz concerts with him, but truthfully I would rather listen to retarded children pounding on pan lids with wooden spoons.

Hate heals, you should try it sometime.

[To audience members who were arriving late] You haven't missed a thing, I was just killing time 'til you got here.

I reckon I am a smart aleck, but it is just a way to pass the time.

I put a What Would Jesus Do bracelet on my Jewish friend's wrist and it burned his skin. He threw it on the ground, it turned into a serpent, we both started laughing. We left it there, we hate snakes. We think they're slimy, even though we know they're not.

I'm funny how, I mean funny like I'm a clown?

The ones that hate you most tend to be the people you know

It just makes me wonder what subject you blame for talking to me every night.' I'm still settling on an answer for that one. Probably Chemistry. Jesus Christ. I can't believe I just wrote that.