Robert Klein Quotes

Jews have a tendency to become comedians.

Some of the funniest people I know are not screwed up in the head.

The Jews are always up for a laugh.

When people, especially from France, would ask me to talk about or so they could write about New York Jewish humor, I'd say I don't know anything about New York Jewish humor. I know who Zero Mostel was and I know Mel Brooks, but that's about all I could tell you about New York Jewish humor.

A comedian is simply a different kind of therapist. A comedian is a psychologist and a psychiatrist rolled into one. Except I can't prescribe medicine. (You still need a doctorate, which is bullshit.) Okay, so I'm not like a psychiatrist. Fine. But I'm still like a psychologist (except I can't diagnose or treat mental illness).

The State of Israel represents and speaks only on behalf of its own citizens, and in no way presumes to represent or speak in the name of the Jews who are citizens of any other country.

The real threat to Zionism is the dilution of quality, Jews know that they can land on their feet in any country of the world. The real test for us is to make Israel such an attractive place—such a cutting-edge place in human society, education, culture, science, quality of life that even Americans Jewish young people will want to come here.

I first discovered the Jewish People in America. I have seen any number of Jews, but the Jewish People I never met in Berlin or elsewhere in Germany. This Jewish People that I found in America came from … Eastern Europe generally. These men and women still retain a healthy ethnic feeling. It has not yet been destroyed by the process of atomization and dispersion.

My biggest pet peeve, I guess, is other comedians criticizing Larry the Cable Guy.

I've just never been a person that was political or religiously savvy. Except for the fact that I was born Jewish. That gives me 10 circumcision jokes.

It often seems that, for whatever strange reasons, comedians, in addition to their formal performances, have more comic experiences in real life than other people do.

It's not hard for me to be funny. But it's really hard. I don't think a lot of people are funny. I meet a lot of people, and most of them aren't funny.

I know a lot of sad people who aren't comedians.

You learn to laugh at yourself, and you also lean on comedy as a crutch to kind of take the edge off because comedians often are self-deprecating, and they cross lines that they shouldn't. Stuff like that brings a smile to my face every once in a while when needed.

I had no desire to get up onstage and tell jokes. I prefer to stand next to really funny people.

Yes, I've seen Louis CK. I wouldn't in any way make a degrading remark about Louis CK, but the question is do I think anyone is funny? And the answer is not too many people. He might fit right in there.

Comedy-wise, I think Chris Elliott is one of the funniest people.

Comedians are not well people. Well people are not drawn to creating.

I did say to myself one day, 'I'd love to be a Jewish comedian,' but that's my only memory with any connection to show business.

Most comedians are borderline psychotic. It's what makes their work interesting.

I think one of the perks of getting to do comedy is the ability to hang out with the funniest people in the world.

I am fascinated by real people who are really funny.

Chris Rock, I think is pretty brilliant, and Amy Schumer's fabulous.

I'm very adamant on social media about recommending comedians to people if they don't know them. I think it's so important to go see them.

One of the great things about us Jews is that we tell the best jokes. Part of the reason is we tell jokes against ourselves - before anyone else gets to do it.