Wildlife Control Quotes

We fill the woods with invasive primates camouflaged to look like piles of leaves who sneak around, sprinkling estrus doe urine and manipulating gadgets that sound like antlers clashing.

Two Million Wild Horses

I just don't believe people can tame animals.

If you want to save a species, simply decide to eat it. Then it will be managed - like chickens, like turkeys, like deer, like Canadian geese.

You can't just let nature run wild.

We were all gun nuts and they were called varmints, crows were, because they ate grain and so did we.

I smell varmint poontang. And the only good varmint poontang is dead varmint poontang, I think.

It's about keeping animals in our environment. They can't be on somebody's purse or shoes or something.

It's true: Every time you kill an elk, you're saving some cow's life.

Because of Kipling, I've sometimes wondered about keeping a mongoose about the house. But given the cobra population in Silver Spring, Maryland - zero, when last I checked - we hardly need a Rikki-Tikki-Tavi.

I personally guarantee that now that bear wouldn't get past Dover without being shot.

A clear cold morning with high wind: we caught in a trap a large gray wolf, and last night obtained in the same way a fox who had for some time infested the neighbourhood of the fort.

I'm not anti-fox hunting because, to me, shooting foxes is even worse and the results are horrendous.

If you are going to develop beast technology, you want to start by having cage technology. You want to make the rules first, you know.

No one is more keen than me to see the Hunting Act repealed, because I believe in the management of wildlife.

We have an uncanny ability to make birds do what we want them to do. In Blood Simple there's a shot from the bumper of a car and it's going up this road and a huge flock of birds takes off at the perfect moment.

Gardeners may create order briefly out of chaos, but nature always gets the last word, and what it says is usually untidy by human standards. But I find all states of nature beautiful, and because I want to delight in my garden, not rule it, I just accept my yen to tame the chaos on one day and let the Japanese beetles run riot on the next.

I am used to wrangling crocodiles.

If the coyote's in your living room pissing on your couch, it's not the coyote's fault. It's your fault for not shooting him.

Once I went so far as to slaughter a woodchuck which ravaged my bean-field,--effect his transmigration, as a Tartar would say,--and devour him, partly for experiment's sake; but though it afforded me a momentary enjoyment, notwithstanding a musky flavor, I saw that the longest use would not make that a good practice, however it might seem to have your woodchucks ready dressed by the village butcher.

Of course, Mississippi participates in federal matching programs for everything from preserving the post-Civil War home of Jefferson Davis to beaver control.

Many people love grey squirrels, but the reality is that they are a real problem for some of our most threatened native species, like the red squirrel and dormouse. It is not realistic, practical or even desirable to completely eradicate grey squirrels, but we must control them effectively.

The nice thing about living in a semi-small town is that I can just go home and switch off. I go home now and I trim roses, rake leaves, wake up early in the morning and scare the raccoons off the lawn! It's kinda nice, that's the way I turn off, in Bakersfield, California.