Inappropriate Humor Quotes

[To his then-Press Secretary:] Give me some jokes for my statement on behalf of retarded children.

Long jesting was never good.

I don't care if my jokes are appropriate for a kid.

Don't be getting sloppy drunk and telling them dirty jokes.

Bill Clinton was doing Ku Klux Klan grand kleagel jokes at Byrd's funeral, saying, Oh, Robert C. Byrd, he used the - he was the grand kleagel. He just did what he had to do.

Vulgarity shouldn't pass off as humour.

Do you ever have dirty thoughts about spongebob?

I will do comedy until the day I die: inappropriate comedy, funny comedy, gender-bending, twisting comedy, whatever comedy is out there.

A witticism in an airport security line is like a Swiss tap - turn it on, and you instantly find yourself in hot water.

Some things are so serious, they can only be joked about.

That's my main flaw: I always think authority figures or my boss is going to think something I do is funny. And usually they don't.

Ah, the patter of little feet around the house. There's nothing like having a midget for a butler.

If parents snicker at racial and gender jokes, another generation will pass on the poison adults still have not had the courage to snuff out.

In keeping with the theme of "I got my hands on," my brother and I would listen to The Diceman Cometh. That was the dirtiest thing we'd ever heard, and we could listen to that at full volume without fear of penalty, because my mom couldn't hear that either. I wasn't a huge comedy fan growing up, but I definitely listened to Andrew Dice Clay a lot.

When in doubt, go for the dick joke.

You can make fun with Saddam Hussein jokes ... but you can't make fun of, say, the concentration camps. I think my target was not so much evil, but benign stupidity people doing stupid things without realising or, instead, thinking they were doing good.

Whoever decided that comic valentines were a good idea should have been sent away to think it over.

Anything I shouldn't laugh at makes me laugh.

I learned all those jokes in second grade. Second grade is really where they tell you those horrific jokes, racist jokes and misogynistic jokes that you have no idea what they mean, and you just memorize them because they have a very strong effect, they make people laugh in this kind of nervous, horrible way, and it's only later that you realize that you've got a head full of crap.

My dad saw 'A Dirty Shame.' I felt bad about my father knowing what 'felching' was.

It is empirically indecent to make fun of the disabled... That's just indecent.

Of course my jokes are in poor taste, inappropriate, and confused; they reveal my lack of security. But that is because I have no respect for myself.

I pass by that it is very culpable to be facetious in obscene and smutty matters.

I learned lots of dirty jokes very young. There was this girl who told me them. The gang I led went in for shoplifting and pulling girls' knickers down. Other boys' parents hated me.