I'm tall, fat, rather bald, red-faced, double-chinned, black-haired, have a deep voice, and wear glasses for reading.
I love bald men. Just because you've lost your fuzz don't mean you ain't a peach.
I am not the archetypal leading man. This is mainly for one reason: as you may have noticed, I have no hair.
What's so brave about being bald? I've not fought for my country or found the cure for cancer - I've just gone out without my hat on!
When I was bald, I went through a period where I seemed to do nothing except TV programmes about being bald.
Hair loss is God's way of telling me I'm human.
I'm still bald, I just wear a toupee.
Bald as the bare mountain tops are bald, with a baldness full of grandeur.
At first, I lost my confidence a little. I'm used to having my hair, but now you have this bald thing on top. Then I got into it. It was easy and free; I didn't have to wash my hair. I just took a hot towel and buffed it to make it nice and shiny.
You can inherit male-pattern baldness from your mother's father, but not a tendency to fight in the First World War.
I'm a bit biased with my love for Kyle Long. I would say he's the best bald guard in football.
I'm not recognised that much. I'm just a bald man in glasses and there's a rash of them in Dublin. It'd be different if I had a mohican.
Once a guy starts using a wig, he has to keep using one. It's, like, his fate. That's why wig makers make such huge profits. I hate to say it, but they're like drug dealers.
That old bald cheater, Time.
Oh, I remember how beautiful you were. You didn't have any hair. You were such a bald little booger, I thought I was going to have to save up to buy you a toupee.
Most guys with toupees overcompensate. They want too much hair. They end up piling it high, looking like a weird flower.
I know what baldness can do to a man. When you see guys with a toupee that should come with a chinstrap, or somebody whose been through hair replacement surgery and tapped out early because it's too painful, you realize guys will do anything to maintain their sense of virility. They don't want to give up looking young.
At the concert I'm going to crown the best looking man, Mr. Tampa. Bald men definitely have an edge.
Every woman should shave her head once in her life, to experience what it feels like.
All of us little bald white guys wearing glasses kind of look the same.
Small, bald white guys like myself - we all kind of look the same.
Almost everyone is bald. And thats because of what they eat.
The worst thing baldness causes is loneliness.
What makes me feel old is having no hair on the top of my head.
Bald is the new black!
