Douglas Adams Quotes

Basically I'm a very serious person, but I think the form it takes with me is comedy. I see the amusing side of all potentially pompous situations.

I think my favorite theory so far is that I am actually a robot. That's pretty great. In real life.

[Comedy] is an escape from illusions. The audience is...thinking, 'This bullshit we see and hear all day makes no sense.'

That's sort of what I wanted to make fun of a little bit with Don Jon. And I think oftentimes, if you're going to talk about a sort of substantial topic like this, the best way to do it is with a sense of humor.

You know very well that I no longer think. I am far too intelligent for that.

As a comedian, I think we all look for those areas where the truth diverts from what people are saying. That's why politics is such a rich area for us, because politicians make promises, and they don't keep them, and when we point out the difference, we get the laugh.

LISP has jokingly been described as "the most intelligent way to misuse a computer." I think that description is a great compliment because it transmits the full flavour of liberation: it has assisted a number of our most gifted fellow humans in thinking previously impossible thoughts.

Yes, Harry, blessed as I am with extraordinary brainpower, I understood everything you told me. I think you might even consider the possibility that I understood more than you did.

I snorted "oh, beauty. What's that good for?" Mary stared, her eyes round. "It won you the prince, did it not?" I snorted again, I prefer to think that he was captivated by my charming personality." I giggled to let Mary know I was trying to make fun of myself.

You’re so sweet,' Frypan said with a snort. 'Go ahead and die with Thomas. I think I’ll sneak away and enjoy living with the guilt.

Well...you're a martyr and I'm a patron saint-I can't think of anyone better!

I was number 1 on the who's likely to die list for 10 years...I was really disappointed when I fell off that list.

I think fur looks better on an animal than on a human being. So I dress my dog in a mink teddy.

Not even a hand-stitched suit could hide a body gone ruinously to seed. I was tempted to offer some fashion advice, but I didn't think he'd welcome the news that this year, bellies are being worn inside the trousers.

I always appreciated my teachers. When I was 16, I gave them the greatest gift I could think of. I dropped out of school.

I don't think wood was discovered in Britain until the 1970's. That's when I discovered it anyway.

Cute? I think my testosterone level just dropped - Ranger

One always overcompensates for disabilities. I'm thinking of having my entire body surgically removed.

I think I have a good sense of humor, but I'm not, like, a joke-teller. I get the jokes, which is sometimes half the battle. Believe me, I have no idea why anyone hires me.

Perhaps,” murmured his lordship, “I yielded to a compassionate impulse.” “A what?” gasped his best friend. “Oh, did you think I never did so?” said his lordship, the satirical glint in his eyes extremely pronounced. “You wrong me! I do, sometimes—not frequently, of course, but every now and then!

I never thought of that before! It's my opinion that you never think at all.

We'll keep you in our thoughts With the other bullshit in your heads? No, keep me out of your thoughts, because I hear some of the stuff you talk about and if that's close to what you're thinking about, I don't want to be around that, so keep me and my family out of your thoughts, unless you're thinking of making me a sandwich.

Luce: But I thought you said I should stay away from the hard cases. Arriane: Rule number two — don't listen to me!

I tried to explain as much as I could," Poppet says. "I think I made an analogy about cake." "Well, that must have worked," Widget says. "Who doesn't like a good cake analogy?

I was thinking that surgeons had to be the happiest people on earth. To cut people up and get paid for it-that's happiness, I told myself.