Mike Epps Quotes

A man has a birthright to be tired and retired. I am retired completely.

I like retirement.

Now, I know you expected me to say that, well, I just kick back in the rocking chair, fished a little bit, listened to Willie Nelson tapes and watched old baseball games on the Classic Sports network. And, tell you the truth, I have done that for maybe about five total minutes.

I'm an old-fashioned guy... I want to be an old man with a beer belly sitting on a porch, looking at a lake or something.

Revenge by young men is considered gain, even at the cost of their own lives, but old men who stay at home in times of war, and mothers who have sons to lose, know better.

I don't know what I'll be like when I'm 60. I already have the traits of a retired gentleman.

Hell, I'm an old man. I'm 70 years old. I'm supposed to be sitting on a rocking chair watching the sunset.

I'm at the age now where just putting my cigar in its holder is a thrill.

I'm a lazy creature when I'm not acting.

Doing nothing is happiness for children and misery for old men.

I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap.

Retirement may be looked upon either as a prolonged holiday or as a rejection, a being thrown on to the scrap-heap.

I suppose the only thing at 50 you can really start to look forward to is just total irresponsibility. As you get older, you can just sit in a chair, wear anything you want, you know you can walk down; old people dress cool. You know they wear sweatpants. The elderly have it down.

Men seem to live for action as long as they can and sink into apathy when they retire.

I don't want to be the guy who sits on a front porch with a mint julep in his hand and rocks his life away.

I am old. My wish now is for an easy, easy life.

I'm starting to get old. I want to eat some hamburgers and just relax.

You know you're getting old when a four-letter word for something pleasurable to do in bed is r-e-a-d.

I'm gonna be on the Hawaiian beaches when I'm old.

I am terribly lazy. So, if I don't have to get out of the house, I will sleep away the entire day.

I'm not afraid of retirement. Retirement sounds like a blast.

There's no retirement, there's just a few years of non-work by the fire with someone bringing you some tea and relative peace and playing with the grandchildren.

When one has reached 81... one likes to sit back and let the world turn by itself, without trying to push it.

So long and take it easy, because if you start taking things seriously, it is the end of you.

I so enjoy being old because for the first time I don't have to do anything-work, teach, study. I feel very good about myself-and at my age I can say no to anything now if I don't want to do it. What a liberating word.