Angie Dickinson Quotes

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand.

My wife is on a new diet. Coconuts and bananas. She hasn't lost weight, but can she climb a tree.

There's nothing like watching Dr. Oz and working out at the same time; you feel like you're the healthiest human being on the planet.

What's the two things they tell you are healthiest to eat? Chicken and fish. You know what you should do? Combine them, eat a penguin.

They've said 'Roseanne's nuts' for years, and now I'm going to make that a reality - I'm all about nuts now, macadamia nuts!

I burned sixty calories. That should take care of a peanut I had in 1962.

Daisy looked up at him with the kind of expression that Jesus might have given someone who had just explained that he was probably allergic to bread and fishes, so could He possibly do him a quick chicken salad.

If you have to explain satire to someone, you might as well give up.

I saw that on Small Business Saturday, the president went shopping at a bookstore and bought 17 books, including "The Laughing Monsters," "Being Mortal," and "Heart of Darkness." Or as the cashier put it, "You OK, man? Maybe a little 'Chicken Soup for the Presidential Soul?'

I'm prepared to take advice on leisure from Prince Philip. He's a world expert on leisure. He's been practicing it for most of his adult life.

Nothing sinister. Just getting exercise. Although some might consider that sinister.

He who laughs last didn't get it in the first place.

Those of you who are not aware of my brilliant career as a stand up comic, I'm not aware of it either so we might well wonder what we're doing here.

So you walk up to this man sinner and you say, "God loves you and He has a wonderful plan for your life!" and he goes, "What? God loves me? That's fantastic. I LOVE ME, TOO! And He loves me more than I love me? Well, that's hard to imagine. I'll take a God like that. You got two of them?"

I did a 22 Days Nutrition program. That's something I know works. Also, do at least an hour of cardio. Eat six meals a day. Meal, snack, meal, snack, meal, snack, meal. Small portions. No carbs, no dairy. You lose it fast and you'll be feeling amazing. It's something that we have to do and discipline ourselves.

Satire, though it may exaggerate the vice it lashes, is not justified in creating it in order that it may be lashed.

You know, sarcasm is the lowest form of wit.' 'And yet it is still extremely funny.

Did you use a chainsaw?" Joey said. "I seem to recall you like chainsawa." "There wasn't a power outlet." Clay turned to me. "That's what I want for Father's Day, darling. A gas powered chainsaw.

I exercise daily to keep my figure. I keep patting my hand against the bottom of my chin. It works too. I have the thinnest fingers in town.

"It would seem that you have no useful skill or talent whatsoever" he said. "Have you thought of going into teaching?"

[To the man who came up to her at a party and exclaimed effusively, 'Tallulah! I haven't seen you for 41 years!':] I thought I told you to wait in the car.

Very deep. You should send that in to the Reader's Digest. They've got a page for people like you.

He wondered why the pelican was the symbol of charity, except it was that it wanted a good deal of charity to admire a pelican.

Now, Max, I think we both know your parents aren't missionaries." I opened my eyes wide. "No? Well, for God's sake, don't tell them. They'd be crushed. Thinking they're doing the Lord's work and all.