Carlos Mencia Quotes

I think one of my first jokes - in the black community, there's people who have jokes about skin tone. People like, 'You so black, you purple.' 'You so black, you gotta smile so we can see you at night.'

From 'Chappelle's Show' to 'Tosh.0,' there's so much race comedy. It's overdone.

You know how Mexican restaurants always have "border" in the name: Border Grill, Border Cafe. You wouldn't do that to black people: Kunta's Kitchen or Shackles. They don't do it to white people. You don't see the Honkey Grill, the Cracker Barrel... oh, nevermind.

I joke around all the time, 'I'm Asian; I'm really good at math.'

Blacks don't square dance. If you see a black person square dancing, it is definitely the seventh sign.

Wayne Brady, I don’t understand why people keep joking that you’re not black. Wayne Brady, you are BLACK. After all, I only remember you for all the years you played an uppity slave on ‘Who’s Line is it Anyway?’.

White people made up the n-word, they knew about racial jokes before anybody, and in their old movies and old cartoons they made fun of everybody, especially black folks. Racial jokes were not new to them.

People basically aren't that racist. They want their laughs. If I make a white guy laugh, he's gonna come see me. He's not gonna go see the white guy who doesn't make him laugh just because that guy is white.

If you look hard enough, you can find race issues and racism in everything. I know people who say, 'See, I don't play pool 'cuz that's where the white ball chase the black ball off the table. So I prefer bowling, where the big black ball knock down the white pins with the red necks.'

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

My only goal as a comedian was to stomp the life out of the model-minority myth.

I'm not just gonna go after the black Jesse Jackson they all want to make fun of, but I know the wrong people are gonna laugh at that. I don't want to play to that crowd. I don't.

Most of my jokes are racist - usually about the Irish.

Funny is not a color. Being black is only good from the time you get from the curtain to the microphone.

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

Your not black enough. If you are black, all you have to do is wear a dashiki and pump your fist, and you’ll get all the money you want.

There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he less savage than the other savages.

Nothing is funnier than a true story told by a bitter old black man.

As a black man, I actually had naturally sort of comedic curiosity about the Klan.

It used to be that the black comic figure had to have this bravado and always showed strength.

Lampooning racism by reproducing brazenly racist imagery is a pretty dubious satirical tactic.

I guess cause i'm black boy, I'm supposed to say 'peace', sing songs, and get capped on.

Sometimes if I really want to get someone's attention, I'll start a sentence with something like, "I'm not racist, but..." I say, "I'm not racist, but you look great today." They say, "That wasn't racist at all." I said, "I know. I said I'm not racist. You never listen. Typical Mexican."

Why can't we have racism that's ignorant but nice? You could have stereotypes that are positive about race. You could say, "Those Chinese people, they can fly!" "You know about the Puerto Ricans? They're made of candy!"

I don't know what to say about Asians. I think everyone is "racist," to differing degrees, in that everyone's brain will automatically associate information with other information, based on the information they are looking at (for example skin color, bone structure), but I think focusing on race in any manner that isn't neutral or self-aware probably increases racism.