Jack L. Chalker Quotes

I always do book signings with the same blue pen. That way, if I add a personalised message to a book I've already signed, it'll be in the same colour as my signature.

I'm not here to perform. I'm here to sign autographs. You have to wait till I come back with my own hand.

I do a lot of meet-and-greets with the people, and I do 'sign shows' where I meet people and sign autographs.

We are in the entertaining business, they want to get autographs, they want to take something home, whether it's a signed hat or, you know, program or whatever it might be.

Well, you know, it's fun to sign autographs still for me. I don't sign that many.

I always have a Sharpie, because usually when someone asks me for an autograph, they don't have a pen. I carry one in my purse, as well as in my tennis bag.

I've never asked a player if they would sign my shoe.

He seemed like such a nice old gentleman—I gave him my autograph as a souvenir.

Just a couple of minutes ago, I signed a couple of bowling pins for some people. That's a normal thing. Somebody will hand me something and say, 'Draw a picture! Draw the Dude!' They're probably selling them on eBay or something.

I have Peter O'Toole's autograph on a first-edition copy of his autobiography that I acquired under false pretenses.

Having signed a few autographs in my time, I always wonder what the heck people do with them.

I try to sign for as many kids as possible. Kids come first, and I'll always sign for a kid before an adult. It's funny, because I was never big into autographs as a kid. The only player who I ever wanted an autograph from was Dave Winfield.

People want me to do the strangest things. They want me to sign their arms or chests.

I did ask Matt Damon for his autograph - and I got a picture, too!

I love being able to sign autographs when I get that extra free time after a round just to be able to give back to the fans.

Any ballplayer that don't sign autographs for little kids ain't an American. He's a communist.

I love meeting fans. The people who are fans of my books are really smart and dedicated, because some independent comics are hard to get. I will drive all the way to Pittsburgh or Detroit to put it in their hands.

It's always been kind of weird to me because when you give someone an autograph, you're looking down at a piece of paper and once you sign it the person moves on.

I've done signings where elderly people will line up to get photos with me and ask me to sign things. They don't even pretend it's for their grandkids. They're like, 'No, it's for me.'

I've signed a few sneakers in my day.

I can imagine that Rod Stewart likes giving autographs because he's pure showbusiness.

When somebody wants me to sign an old picture, it's like looking at another person.

Oh, the most fun thing I've ever been asked to autograph was breasts.

If I'm doing a play, 30 to 40 percent of the people that come to the stage door have pictures of 'Alien' for me to autograph. And usually, the photos are pretty gory ones.

I used to collect autographs outside of the old Cleveland Stadium. I can still remember everyone who took the time and spent a few minutes to make your day. That sticks with you.