David Koechner Quotes

I have seven children. Even if you got a lot of money, feeding 5, 6, 7, 8 mouths, it will do some damage to your pocket.

I tell ya, it's tough to save a buck. Right now I'm supporting two fighters. My wife and her mother.

I knew a dude whose entire check was going to his car. He didn't care. This is back when the Mustang 5.0 came out in, like, '82. Between paying the note and insurance, I think he had like $40 left. A lot of people knew people because of their car, and not them.

As a mother, I - like everyone else - have to fill my gas tank in my car. I have to feed my family. I have to be able to make sure that I can keep a roof over their heads and, with things escalating the way they are, it's very difficult. People are losing their homes.

Guilleaume left La Praline with a small bag of florentines in his pocket; before he had turned the corner of avenue des Francs Bourgeois I saw him stoop to offer one to the dog. A pat, a bark, a wagging of the short stubby tail. As I said, some people never have to think about giving.

Higher energy prices act like a tax. They reduce the disposable income people have available for other things after they've paid their energy bills.

A stray dog, I might understand," she said. "But this? You are too softhearted." No, Mabry," Ravus said. "I am not." He looked in Val's direction. "I think she wants to die." Maybe you can help her after all," Mabry said. "You're good at helping people die.

I know how hard it is for you to put food on your family.

We only have one dog now. Calamity Jane had to be put down. She was very old, and her medicine no longer controlled her seizures. Dilly is five now, I think. He's a neutered American Pit Bull Terrier, very gentle, about the color of buckskin.

Some people just don’t appreciate having a dog around. It’s sad to think there are people like that. I knew Gloria was that way—maybe that’s why she could never be truly happy.

The people who are having the hard time right now are middle-income Americans. Under the president's policies, middle-income Americans have been buried. They're just being crushed. Middle-income Americans have seen their income come down by $4,300. This is a tax in and of itself. I'll call it the economy tax. It's been crushing.

I think every family should have a dog; it is like having a perpetual baby; it is the plaything and crony of the whole house. It keeps them all young.

Here you go, she said. I don't need it anymore. I'm very grateful. I think it may have saved my life, saved some other people's death.

We're telling small-business owners that not only are we going to raise their costs by a buck and a quarter, but we're also going to raise it with these cost-of-living adjustments. Here's what's going to happen: They're going to have to lay people off.

People who cost too much: manager, lawyer, publicist, label, music publisher.

My wife, Tania, is very big on dogs, so I'm always paying out to animal charities.

Gods? Don't let that impress you. Anyone can be a god if they have enough worshippers. You don't even have to have powers anymore. In my time I've seen theatre gods, gladiator gods, even storyteller gods - you people see gods everywhere. Gives you an excuse for not thinking for yourselves. God is just a word. Like Fury. like demon, Just words people use for things they don't understand. Reverse it and you get dog. It's just as appropriate.

Dogs serve people, but people serve cats.

If you’ll dare to take your mind off your troubles, get your mind off your own needs and, instead, seek to be a blessing to other people, God will do more for you than you could even ask or think.

It's brutal. I see friends when their shows don't work. Everything's riding on making money and all the pressure and how people scatter when fortunes turn downward.

I think I actually made a very kind gesture out of nowhere; I decided in the middle of that match that for every ace I hit I want to donate money. I just think people should honestly look at themselves before they judge another person. I've never been spoiled. I want a Range Rover very bad, but I refuse to spend the money to buy a Range...The diamonds are borrowed. I won't buy them because I'm too cheap.

I think some dogs may like the attention of being dressed up by their humans because they interpret it as affection, but unless it's something that you've made the dog used to from the time it was a puppy, it's probably going to always feel a little weird and unnatural to the dog. This doesn't mean I think people should never dress their dogs up as long as they do it for the right reasons. If you're putting booties and a coat on your dog to protect it from the weather, then that's a pretty legitimate reason.

A wedding invitation is sent by people who have been saying, "Do we have to ask them?" to people whose first response is, "How much do you think we have to spend on them?

People always want to compare their dogs to having kids. That's insulting. First of all, nobody has a dog because they were too drunk to pull out.

Every Saturday we work in the yard, pick up the dog doo, hope that it's hard.