Merv Griffin Quotes

I'm 86 and my doctor used to tell me to slow down - at least he did until he dropped dead.

No crash diets work. I have tried everything, believe me.

I know of nothing more laughable than a doctor who does not die of old age.

I tell people diets don't work. And I don't care what they say. I have tried them all.

Howie's doctor told him to lose ten pounds, and since Howie's been on a diet he's gained three.

It's a well-known fact: in order to follow doctor's orders, you have to be healthy as a horse.

Don't smoke too much, drink too much, eat too much or work too much. We're all on the road to the grave - but there's no need to be in the passing lane.

I can't die yet, doctor. Not yet. I have things to do. Afterwords I'll have a whole lifetime in which to die.

The downfall of most diets is that they restrict your intake of food.

The oil lobby, perhaps the most powerful lobby on earth, is almost matched by hospital owners and doctors.

To me the analogy [to climate change] is... doctors worry a lot about cholesterol. And if you go to the doctor, and the doctor says "oh, your life would be happier if you ate a different diet and exercised" people pay no attention.

To the sick the doctors wisely recommend a change of air and scenery.

I think I can get five, six, seven more years out of this arm and these legs.

You need a good bedside manner with doctors or you will get nowhere.

May you live as long as you are fit to live, but no longer, or, may you rather die before you cease to be fit to live than after!

Do not believe yourself healthy. Immortality is health; this life is a long sickness.

I distrust all television doctors.

These days the biggest issue is how many calories you consume. So all of this stuff distracts people from thinking about calories.

When asked in his late 90s if his doctor knew he still smoked, Burns said, 'No ... he's dead.'

Physical ills are the taxes laid upon this wretched life; some are taxed higher, and some lower, but all pay something.

Atheists have an excellent longevity record because we have no place to go after we die, so we take good care of ourselves and our world while we are here.

Listen to me: die after me, all right? I don't care what else you do, where you go, how you screw up your life, just... survive. Outlive me, please.

When I was growing up they used to say, "Robin, drugs can kill you." Now that I'm 58 my doctor's telling me, "Robin, you need drugs to live." I realize now that my doctor is also my dealer.

Before going on a diet you should consult your doctor, or at least send him some money.

I've been on every diet in the world. I've been on Slim-Fast. For breakfast you have a shake. For lunch, you have a shake. For dinner, you kill anyone with food on their plate.