Groucho Marx Quotes

I love a woman, I love to judge how beautiful she is, how beautiful I can make her.

Among all the diseases of the mind there is not one more epidemical or more pernicious than the love of flattery.

I've had women telling me I'm bloody gorgeous but I haven't had any kinky pictures. Everything's been quite tame - from the women!

She offered her mouth to him, as if enchanted. A Persian princess, a little Indian, a fox, a morning glory, a lovely wisteria--it always pleased them when you told them they looked like something, like something else.

But if anything will turn me off, it's a very practiced approach, as if the man has done it a thousand times before, to a lot of different women. Which always seems to imply that I am no different from all the rest. Not flattering.

Flattery is like cologne water, to be smelt, not swallowed.

I hate careless flattery, the kind that exhausts you in your efforts to believe it.

At university, I said to a girl, 'Before I met you all I could think about was history; now, all I can think about is you'. I thought that was the sort of thing you had to say.

The art of pleasing is the art of deception.

Flattery is a kind of bad money, to which our vanity gives us currency.

Flirting is funny. And it's awkward and weird.

I used to always make art for girls. That was the thing I did for girls to like me. I did portraits, drawings, letters that formed outlines of significant things in our relationship. Art. I just used art in general. It usually worked.

He that loves to be flattered is worthy o' the flatterer.

I saw him turn his charm on and off, like water from the tap at the kitchen sink. He said nothing of substance. He seemed to me essentially an actor.

Flattery makes friends and truth makes enemies

The days and weeks of screwed-up smiles and laboured courtesy, the mock geniality, the hearty shake of the filthy hand, the chuckling reply that must be made to the coarse joke, the loathsome, choking compliment that must be paid to the grimy wife and sluttish daughter, the indispensable flattery of the vilest religious prejudices, the wholesale deglutition of hypocritical pledges.

Hypocrisy and rhetorical flimflam are standard in politics …

Being a sex symbol isn't cool unless you're in love with a girl, and she calls you a sex symbol.

That's all it takes in life to win a woman over - a good gimmick.

Flattery is no more than what raises in a man's mind an idea of a preference which he has not.

To be flattered is grateful, even when we know that our praises are not believed by those who pronounce them; for they prove, at least, our power, and show that our favour is valued, since it is purchased by the meanness of falsehood.

Men sometimes think they hate flattery, but they hate only the manner of flattering.

Sometimes we think we dislike flattery, but it is only the way it is done that we dislike.

I'm not honest, but you're interesting!