John Mulaney Quotes

I've heard it said that people come into our lives for a reason Bringing something we must learn And we are led to those who help us most to grow If we let them and we help them in return.

All friendship is desirable in itself, though it starts from the need of help

Think twice before burdening a friend with a secret.

I would never put my close friends or a real relationship on a show.

I've learned the hard way how valuable privacy is. And I've learned that there are a lot of things in your life that really benefit from being private. And relationships are one of them.

You don't need to know who I'm dating. You don't need to know what I'm doing. I'm fine with everybody not knowing that.

Sometimes you have to keep things very close to your own chest in your life, or this life.

I am not somebody who likes to give advice, or anything like that, unless it's my closest friends or family.

The gossip mill on tour is always turning. I have to be a little careful about what I tell guys who I don't consider close friends, because even though they might not spread it to other players, they'll usually tell their wives. And once the wives get it, it's gone.

I don't talk about my boyfriend because it's boring.

I've always been super-private and protective of certain experiences and certain friends.

If you do get to know me, I'll tell everything to you. But I don't want to tell everything to the wrong people.

My relationships are between me and whomever I'm with, not between me and the world.

I simply value Arthur Capel friendship. And even so, he knows very little about me.

One shouldn't be too inquisitive in life Either about God's secrets or one's wife.

Famous people like to choose friends who won't go around repeating their conversations and details about them.

I really don't understand minimalism. It is so polite and boring. If you don't want anyone to notice you, you should stay home and grow your own vegetables.

Between friends there is no need for justice, but people who are just still need the quality of friendship; and indeed friendliness is considered to be justice in the fullest sense.

What a lot of things there are a man can do without.

I'm a minimalist at heart. If a song doesn't need a solo, I'm not going to force one into it.

The less I needed, the better I felt.

I'm not one to hide anything, but I don't feel the need to comment directly on [my relationships]... I think it would be a shame to not live in the moment and not enjoy everything that's happening in fear of other people's opinions.

In my life, what I want and what I need are exactly the same. Anything in excess of needs is burdensome to me. You couldn't give me anything I don't need. I am penniless, but have difficulty remaining so. Several of my well meaning, well-to-do friends have offered me large sums of money, which I of course refused.

It's not hard for me to figure out who I like or who my friends are. I trust my energy meter, but I'm also not afraid to let people in who might hurt me.

People say friends don't destroy one another. What do they know about friends?