Jim Jefferies Quotes

Make no mistake: I love women. I'm married to one, I was birthed by one, and I played one in my high school production of 'Romeo and Juliet.' No one else could fit into the bodice.

I don't think comedy is necessarily an attack. It's finding humour in life. I don't think if you're making a joke about something you're automatically demeaning it.

They always use the word 'insult' with me, but I don't hurt anybody. I wouldn't be sitting here if I did. I make fun of everybody and exaggerate all our insecurities.

'Blithe Spirit' is played almost all over Britain somewhere at all times because it is such a unique and ridiculously funny show. But it's also, in fact, under those layers of humor, a very serious show. It's quite misogynistic.

People hate jokes.

They're just jokes, people. They can't all be funny.

Well, speaking as a feminist, I'm glad that women can lead--uh, groups of unspeakable magical evil." "Yes," Alan said gravely. "It'd be shoking if the evil magicians were sexist. For one thing, that would mean they were stupid, and having stupid enemies would be a terrible blow to my manly pride.

Sometimes my humor does offend people, and I've said it before: I don't write jokes to be offensive. I write jokes to be funny, and I guess what I find funny are things that other people sometimes find offensive. I would love nothing more than to never offend anyone, but it just doesn't seem to work out that way.

I do believe that on a whole, women are definitely smarter than men... I also believe that dogs are smarter than women. No? That one, you don't believe it? You believe that I didn't do a series of tests? You are right to not believe it, because I'm going to go ahead and admit that I do not believe what I just said, it was what's described as a 'joke.' Um, I'll be telling a bunch of them here tonight.

A joke's a very serious thing.

I think any decent comedy worth its salt has to have heart, otherwise it's just a bunch of jokes. I think people enjoy comedies that have a heart and soul to them.

A woman doing comedy doesn't offend me, but sets me back a bit. I, as a viewer, have trouble with it. I think of her as a producing machine that brings babies in the world.

Wit is a weapon. Jokes are a masculine way of inflicting superiority. But humor is the pursuit of a gentle grin, usually in solitude.

Comedy should be easy, not laboured.

I don't say things to be offensive; I say things because they're funny to me. It amuses me.

It's much easier to make jokes about sensitive issues if there is some dissent, some conflict.

There's an art to stupid comedy. There's an art to offensive comedy, and I think the key is it's just gotta make you laugh.

Puns are a form of humor with words.

My capacity for humour may have come largely from my father - he liked to entertain people, make people laugh.

I do love jokes.

With anything you put out there, you're going to offend somebody, but most people get that it's a joke, that I'm playing a character, and that I'm actually making fun of what I'm saying by saying it.

Neil Hamburger writes such cutting jokes.

I take a lot of pride in managing to be funny without having a victim at the end of my joke. I laugh at a really dark joke as much as the next person, but my jokes, I feel, don't have to hurt anybody to be really funny.

In general, comedians are attracted to vice.

We don't apologize for a joke. We are comics. We are here to make you laugh. If you don't get it, then don't watch us.