John Oates Quotes

I think its wonderful to have a relationship where you both go out and live your lives, and you bring something to the table because you've had other interactions.

There comes a crossroads in every marriage where you grow together or grow apart. I outgrew Len. He wanted me to be in that leather jumpsuit for the rest of my life and do nothing else. He constrained me. It got to a point where the marriage died or I did.

If we are happy within ourselves, we don't accept or demand that our partner should fulfill every need. We need to be comfortable with our own company.

How hard it is to have the beautiful interdependence of marriage and yet be strong in oneself alone.

Communication is a continual balancing act, juggling the conflicting needs for intimacy and independence. To survive in the world, we have to act in concert with others, but to survive as ourselves, rather than simply as cogs in a wheel, we have to act alone.

Independence is fun, especially when there's a beloved waiting in the wings, and freedom makes you a more interesting person. Having separate lives brings fresh air into a relationship.

To be happy with a man you must understand him a lot and love him a little. To be happy with a woman you must love her a lot and not try to understand her at all.

I figure when you get married, it doesn't matter how much you earn or how much your husband earns, just as long as everything you do for the house is together, while still reserving some part of yourself to be yourself.

Those men get along best with women who can get along best without them.

When a man sees you are happy with him but you can be just as happy having nothing to do with him, that's when he won't want to leave your side.

I'm always battling how to be in a relationship while simultaneously maintaining my independence and my career.

The best relationship is one that does not foster too much independence nor too much dependence, but exists in the healthy interdependence zone.

I think both husband and wife should have busy minds, not see too much of each other, but not too little either: just get it right. If both are healthy in their heads and satisfied with their day's work, the partnership works.

I've had relationships with men who are simply not willing to change their lifestyle. That's fine if you're unformed as a woman and you're able to blend yourself into something that's a convenient vessel. It's hard once you become a mother, I'll tell you. Something changes.

Salman has his own personal equation. I have my own personal equation. We are sometimes not even a part of each other's celebration or happiness. But we are definitely there when somebody is down.

Sometimes a lot of us men think we are doing everything for the woman we love, but there is an aspect of a woman a man doesn't understand.

Once I found professional happiness, it gave me time to think about other areas in my life in which I wasn't happy. The next obvious candidate for introspection was my marriage.

I couldn't bear a marriage in which one partner hinges on the other.

I'm not really easy to live with! There needs to be unlimited patience and unconditional love. Men I've known before loved my independent spirit and were proud of my success, to the point that they'd become jealous of the time I devote to my career.

I think when a couple stays together, it's because of compromises they've both made.

I'm not looking for a 'yes' woman, but a strong person who knows when to be objective and when not to be.

I don't need to control anything. Even with romantic partnerships, I don't need to control anyone.

Boyfriends have to understand me and my needs. They have to know what I want out of my life and about my strict regime. I go to bed at 10pm and not later. I separate my professional and private lives.

Relationships are a constant negotiation and balance.

Look for someone who has a complete life without you in it. If you have a person you don't need for anything, that's ideal. You're just together because you really want to be.