Andy Roddick Quotes

I've had great success being a total idiot.

Not everyone can be as successful a performer as myself, who gave 10 great performances the first time I ever did comedy, and then toiled in obscurity for years.

I'm severely overrated. I'm just above a hack. That should be the name of my new DVD: 'Chris Rock: Slightly Above Hack'.

Comedy is incredibly hard. You have to be loose. You have to be not afraid to fail.

I have never struggled, and I have never done anything.

Over the years, I learned that in my career, unlike in life, sometimes my wheelchair is its own automatic door opener. I was able to win the OWN competition by applying one simple principle: be funny, and admit you suck before anyone else can call you out on it. In other words, make the narrative of your failure a comedy.

I think it's better to be overly ambitious and fail than to be underambitious and succeed in a mundane way. I have been very fortunate. I failed upward in my life!

I do public appearances. I'm bluff, hearty, goofy. I wear loud clothes, and I read the funny bits. I occasionally get taken to task for one thing or another, and I acknowledge my fault, my flaw, my failure, and I move on.

If I scribbled a few words on a cocktail napkin and showed it to my family, they'd proclaim it astonishing and more culturally relevant than the Bible.

You can get rich making fun of me. I know. I've made lots of money making fun of me.

When you see grown men near to tears because they've missed hitting a little white ball into a hole from three feet, it makes you laugh.

It's funny, because I never think of myself as Little Miss All-Together.

I think comedy I've learned is really just about relaxing and trusting yourself and allowing yourself to fail.

In the startup world, you're either a genius or an idiot. You're never just an ordinary guy trying to get through the day.

I'm not a doctor. I just have a tremendous amount of common sense.

You can call me the bad boy chef all you want. I'm not going to freak out about it. I'm not that bad. I'm certainly not a boy, and it's been a while since I've been a chef.

As I've said before, and I still hold to, I truly am the most boring person alive. And if there was a great investigation to be found at the end of the resume, it would be, the most boring person alive.

I've turned arrogance into an artform, where it's so absurd that it becomes comedy. But I've never done anything to hurt anybody or steal from anyone.

I'm very good at daydreaming. Ask any of my schoolteachers.

If my critics saw me walking over the Thames they would say it was because I couldn't swim.

I'm so down to earth, I'm bringing gravity back.

Comedy was my sport. It taught me how to roll with the punches. Failure is the exact same as success when it comes to comedy because it just keeps coming. It never stops.

Success is a lousy teacher. It seduces smart people into thinking they can't lose.

I would describe my dancing talents as incredibly deep.

Math and reading are my only weaknesses - other than that, I'm perfect.