George Carlin Quotes

If black boxes survive air crashes - why don't they make the whole plane out of that stuff?

Why don't they make the whole plane out of that black box stuff.

In the early days of aviation, there was a great deal of experimentation and a high death rate.

There's simply no substitute for experience in terms of aviation safety.

If you can walk away from a landing, it's a good landing. If you use the airplane the next day, it's an outstanding landing.

By 1931, after a few years' experience of flying scheduled airlines, those planes were operating at roughly 600 times the safety of the space shuttle. I look at safety not in terms of fatalities per passenger-mile, but when you get in and close the door, what is the risk of dying on this flight?

They say any landing you can walk away from is a good one.

It is extraordinary how safe flying has become. You are now statistically more likely to be elected president of the United States in your lifetime than you are to die in a plane crash. What an amazing achievement as a society! But what we end up focusing on are the catastrophic failures that are incredibly rare but happen every now and then.

I've spent an awful lot of my time in the air. I've had everything happen to me in a plane that could happen. Except a crash.

Aviation is the branch of engineering that is least forgiving of mistakes.

The sheer number of facts that are unknown about what happened when Malaysia 370 disappeared is quite staggering.

As far as my personality, my friends and family know I'm crazy! I love to have fun; I'm bubbly. People say I'm funny but I don't know that I'm funny: I don't try to be funny and tell jokes and stuff like that, but I always got something slick to say.

If a natural disaster like a flock of birds or a bolt of lightning causes a plane's engines to fail, you know what should be expected? That the pilot will keep his or her wits about them and do their best to save each and every soul on board. That's precisely what Captain 'Sully' Sullenberger and the rest of his crew did.

I flew everywhere for the first 10 years of my career, and I started to not like commercial transport. I just don't feel safe.

Some people have no idea what they're doing, and a lot of them are really good at it.

If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?

If Charles Lindbergh, flying with no instruments other than a bologna sandwich, managed to cross the Atlantic and land safely on a runway completely covered with French people, why are today's airplanes, which are equipped with radar and computers and individualized liquor bottles, unable to cope with fog?

The caterpillar does all the work, but the butterfly gets all the publicity.

Is a vegetarian permitted to eat animal crackers?

I do not use airplanes. They strike me as unsporting. You can have an automobile accident-and survive. You can be on a sinking ship-and survive. You can be in an earthquake, fire, volcanic eruption, tornado, what you will-and survive. But if your plane crashes, you do not survive. And I say the heck with it.

Political correctness is tyranny with manners.

It's never just a game when you're winning.

The other day the plane that Barack Obama was on had some mechanical difficulties and was forced to land. Well, the National Transportation Safety Board did an inspection on the plane, and you know what they found? The bolts on the plane were fine, but apparently Jesse Jackson had taken some of the nuts off.

No matter how you care to define it, I do not identify with the local group. Planet, species, race, nation, state, religion, party, union, club, association, neighborhood improvement committee; I have no interest in any of it. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them, I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.

I think I am, therefore, I am... I think.