Johnny Carson Quotes

We can be lied to only so many times. The best thing that he [President Nixon] can do for the country is to get the hell out of the White House and get out this afternoon.

I never thought I would see a President of the United States say on television that “I am not a crook.” The worst part of it was, Nixon couldn’t even look the camera in the eye.

Nixon was so crooked that he needed servants to help him screw his pants on every morning.

Nixon was the most dishonest individual I have ever met in my life. He lied to his wife, his family, his friends, his colleagues in the Congress, lifetime members of his own political party, the American people and the world.

He [Richard M. Nixon] told us he was going to take crime out of the streets. He did. He took it into the damn White House.

You roll back the stones and you find the slithering things of the world of Richard Nixon.

I wouldn't trust [Richard] Nixon from here to that phone.

… a lying crook in the Presidency

They [the Republicans] are the most crooked, lying bunch I have ever seen.

They spend us into the dirt and lie like crazy, and, my gosh, I have never seen an opponent who just lies like he's taking a drinking of water like Terry McAuliffe. It is nothing to him.

Jyoti Basu is the biggest fraud, cheat, and con man in West Bengal.

One of my most often repeated quips was the one I made when former Presidents Carter, Ford and Nixon stood by each other at a White House event. 'There they are,' I said. 'See no evil, hear no evil, and . . . evil.'

The evil is in the White House at the present time.

[Richard M. Nixon was] a foul caricature of himself, a man with no soul, no inner convictions, with the integrity of a hyena and the style of a poison toad.

I lie, I cheat, and I steal.

Nick plays a corrupt politician, which is kind of a redundant statement.

Richard Nixon is a no good, lying bastard. He can lie out of both sides of his mouth at the same time, and if he ever caught himself telling the truth, he'd lie just to keep his hand in.

I am not a crook.

There are people who say, 'Oh, he's a crook.' But I'm not a crook.

What bothers me is that Jim Bakker lies. Jim Bakker knows for a fact that I was virgin.

I don’t know what he was so angry about. He won…. If I had won, he would have been much better off. He would have been spared getting disgraced by Watergate.

… they seem to be such as would not swear, whore, nor be drunk, but they would lie, cozen and deceive.

If you do not know how to lie, cheat and steal, turn your attention to politics and learn.

What is this "Watergate?

There are at least eighty liars in the convention.