Mitch Hedberg Quotes

I hate turkeys. If you go to the grocery store, you start to get mad at turkeys. You see turkey ham, turkey bologna, turkey pastrami. Somebody just needs to tell the turkeys, "Man, just be yourselves!" I already like you, little fella. I used to draw you. If you had a couple of fingers missing, you would draw a really messed-up turkey. That turkey was in an accident!

Let the world know you as you are, not as you think you should be, because sooner or later, if you are posing, you will forget the pose, and then where are you?

Being confident in your own skin is very sexy. I think when you have fun and are yourself that is sexy too.

Nobody can be exactly like me. Even I have trouble doing it.

The turkey has a destiny which ends on San Martino's day.

As long as you're having fun and still doing stuff, it doesn't matter what other people think.

I'm not a big turkey fan, but my husband loves it. Thanksgiving is his favorite meal.

My favorite meal is turkey and mashed potatoes. I love Thanksgiving, it's just my favorite. I can have Thanksgiving all year round.

I love chicken. I would eat chicken fingers on Thanksgiving if it were socially acceptable.

Turkeys are perfect for feeding larger gatherings.

That was a real learning element for me, because I realized that the more true you are to yourself, the more you will lose people.

If I were like a lot of other people, then it wouldn't be fun; but since I'm like me, it's okay.

You don't realize you're vying for the approval of everyone so much until being yourself is not approved of.

I don't think you can do something wrong with your identity if you're living in your authenticity.

You have to be who you are.

Having to stake out your identity and have people question whether or not you're being yourself was a tension that I could relate to.

In my opinion turkey is the most over-rated critter for eating purposes in kingdom come but the most striking example we have of the power of propaganda.

I feel I always have to work harder, I have to impress all the time. Impress whom? With what? People say, "Just be yourself." Well, my anxiety is that people aren't going to want that.

Finally, I asked how you got a boy to like you back. She said, 'Just be yourself,' as though I had any idea who that might be.

And identity is funny being yourself is funny as you are never yourself to yourself except as you remember yourself and then of course you do not believe yourself.

Anybody who told you to be yourself simply couldn't have given you worse advice.

Being yourself is one of the hardest thing because it's scary you always wonder whether you'll be accepted for who you really are.

Turkey: A large bird whose flesh, when eaten on certain religious anniversaries has the peculiar property of attesting piety and gratitude.

Chickens are cheerless birds, I advise you to keep geese which can be taught to follow like dogs, one needs all the companionship one can get in these days.

I understand that nobody understands me, but I can't be someone I'm not.