Maria Bamford Quotes

I can control the weather with my moods. I just can’t control my moods.

I love meeting famous people. I'm even happy just looking at them.

I really don't think I could get starstruck with anybody. Famous final words, but I just don't think I could.

Once they began doing 'Celebrity Apprentice,' apparently the audience wasn't that keen on the ordinary apprentice. That is probably the best indictment with our fascination with celebrity in our culture, which drives me crazy.

The weather varies between heavy fog and pale sunshine; My thoughts follow the exact same process.

Usually when I see someone famous, for some reason, I think I know them.

It's always a little mind-boggling to realize that these famous actors know who I am.

I find it weird the way people get so excited about celebrity. If my friends are on the phone, their friends will say: 'Is that kid from 'Love Actually' there?' And the phone gets passed round and I have to speak to this stranger asking: 'Are you famous?' I don't know how to answer.

I don't think I have any celeb crushes!

Having casual conversations with the likes of Lena Dunham and Kim Kardashian makes me weak in the knees. I have so much respect and admiration for Lena that it doesn't matter how many times I talk to her - I get starstruck.

The real fans do not just admire the star of their choice, they identify with him or her, while the star, unlike Joan Crawford, comes to need the fans' love, admiration, and constant interest.

If you pay close attention, you'll notice we continually hear about basically the same 150 celebrities.

For the same reason we have the Brad Pitts and the George Clooneys, it's just part of human nature to idolize stereotypes.

I never get star-struck. I never fanboy. Ever, ever, ever.

Most movie-goers are overdosing on star coverage; it's the ultimate example of too much information.

Groupies to me, were people who followed you around. Familiar faces who were always there, asking for autographs. We have more of those now, but they're not sexual.

Celebrity culture, it's everywhere, isn't it? It's reality TV, Big Brother. I didn't become a footballer to be famous, I became a footballer to be successful. I didn't want to be famous. Now people want to be famous. Why? Why would you want people following you about all day?

Stars talk about how they dislike fans fussing over them, begging for autographs and things like that, but deep down inside, they love every minute of it.

There's this way pop culture has been rammed down our throats that people think that if they were just in the right place at the right time, they'd be married to Heidi Klum.

Now celebrity has taken on a holy status all of its own, and we look to the stars to provide us with the transcendental experience that was once achieved through religion.

There are no big groupie fans or anything.

There's no royalty in America, so people deify actors.

What I can't completely understand is most other people's fascination with what the famous among us do with their lips and the rest of their bodies. Why do ordinary people become the target of this curiosity simply by virtue of the fact that other people recognise their names and faces but know almost nothing else about them?

If I was still at school, I'd be looking at Britney Spears and dying to be her.

It is as if my life were magically run by two electric currents: joyous positive and despairing negative - whichever is running at the moment dominates my life, floods it.