Ben Gibbard Quotes

I think invariably when you are dealing with relationships, the films really center on that, and the plot is really born out of that. That's the most core part of a relationship: intimacy, I think, whether it's expressed or not.

It's very difficult to judge relationships from the outside. You never know what happens in intimate moments with two people to know why they really support and love each other.

When a woman says the connection is gone, don't tell her how hot she is. A connection is more than someone's appearance.

... talk, not sex, constitutes most of the intercourse between a man and his wife.

I’ve always preferred having girlfriends to just seeing people.

During sex, my girlfriend always wants to talk to me… Just the other night she called me from a hotel.

The more familiar two people become, the more the language they speak together departs from that of the ordinary, dictionary-defined discourse. Familiarity creates a new language, an in-house language of intimacy that carries reference to the story the two lovers are weaving together and that cannot be readily understood by others.

Just the fact that you need me to prove I love you is probably a clue it isn’t working

My wife and I have created our own language. We can be at a table with six other people and have an argument without anyone knowing. It doesn't even have to be out loud. It's bizarre.

So many young people think the big sex act is the whole movie, but that's not the case. You need to be able to talk and laugh and cry together.

Someone gave me the Love Languages book, and that has been the best book I've ever read about relationships and has helped me the most.

Our proximity keeps us honest. Our intentions keep us strangers.

My wife is possessive and I like that

All of my books have an element of a man who is in love with somebody and needs them desperately, not just for procreation but for being able to fully unbosom himself. He only feels comfortable discussing things with women. Which is funny, because 80 percent of readers are women!

The main thing going on around intimacy is that we've developed a lot of strategies so we'll be a desirable package.

Men would always rather be made love to than talked at.

Any good marriage involves a certain amount of play-acting.

A man likes to feel that he is loved, a woman likes to be told.

A deadness occurs in relationships when people are no longer willing to tell each other how they really feel. When people first fall in love they're more willing to do this because they're still getting to know each other and dependency has not yet set in. As soon as it does, though, people often stop sharing their true feelings out of fear of loss.

a lot of brothers don't understand. When it comes to making love, reciprocity is everything.

Money cannot buy the fuel of love but is excellent kindling.

Whereas a lot of men used to ask for conversation when they really wanted sex, nowadays they often feel obliged to ask for sex even when they really want conversation.

But I think if it's the right person, you wouldn't have to work so hard at intimacy. I think—hope—it would just happen naturally. Otherwise, opening up to the wrong person..." I made a face. "Like putting ammo in their hands.

The happiest moments in any affair take place after the loved one has learned to accommodate the lover and before the maddening personality of either party has emerged like a jagged rock from the receding tides of lust and curiosity.