Hasan Minhaj Quotes

I am too much of a control freak to be a drinker.

I drink no more than a sponge.

Better to sleep with a sober cannibal than a drunken Christian.

I cannot drink or do anything that changes the mind.

I never stood in a public house bar and alcoholic drink never touched my lips.

I promise ... to abstain from all kinds of intoxicating drink, unless used medically.

Abstinence from spirituous liquors is the best safeguard of morals and health.

I am not a member of any temperance society; but I am temperate, in this, that I don’t drink anything.

Take heed to your selves, lest at any time your hearts be overcharged with surfeiting and drunkenness.

Physical fitness is a farce without self-control, judgment, and discretion, which are the three qualities of mind first to be dulled by and made incompetent by the use of alcohol

I've never had a sip of alcohol.

I try to have little or no alcohol when I go to a big conference. Sorry to be a party pooper, but that stuff can regress you really fast, and this is not a good place to regress.

My rule - and I feel like this is a pretty good rule for life - no drinking while on television. I do not ever imbibe.

something has been said for sobriety but very little.

For in my youth I never did apply Hot and rebellious liquors in my blood.

An American monkey, after getting drunk on brandy, would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men.

I work very hard to keep on an even keel as far as alcohol is concerned.

It is not true that drink changes a man's character. It may reveal it more clearly.

I had to give up martinis - I enjoyed them too much.

Regardless of what one's attitude towards prohibition may be, temperance is something against which, at a time of war, no reasonable protest can be made.

All the mistakes I've ever made in my life have been when I've been drunk. I haven't made hardly any mistakes sober, ever, ever.

The point of drinking in moderation is that sometimes you don't drink in moderation.

I never drank except a couple sips of wine at Thanksgiving.

A drunkard is one thing, and a temperate man is quite another.

It is best to rise from life as from a banquet, neither thirsty nor drunken.