Jim Gaffigan Quotes

Gerard and I pretty much share all parenting responsibilities, although I'm definitely the disciplinarian.

Be a father first. Don't put a priority of being a friend with your wife first, or a friend with your kids first.

Things parents say to children are oftentimes not heard, but in some cases you pick up on things that your parent would like to see you have done.

Dad was a strict disciplinarian and would give us a wallop with a wooden spoon if we were out of order. But we really respected him - he didn't try to be our best friend.

You were born to lead as mothers and fathers, because nowhere is righteous leadership more crucial than in the family.

Parents, you know, can be terrible.

Fathers are biological necessities, but social accidents.

I wasn't against becoming a dad: I'd had a good childhood, as childhoods go, and as role models, my imperfect parents were as good as or better than most.

I don't agree with the whole 'my mother's my friend' approach, because you're their mum and there has to be a difference between the generations.

We need to stop the erosion of parental authority.

And part of that is, what is the point of having children if you don't have the privilege of bringing them up?

Parenthood is a very, very intense experience.

No matter how calmly you try to referee, parenting will eventually produce bizarre behavior, and I'm not talking about the kids. Their behavior is always normal.

Mothers play an important role as the heart of the home, but this in no way lessens the equally important role fathers should play, as head of the home, in nurturing, training, and loving their children.

I have a child and I'm a parent first of all.

We're living in a time when parenting is not at all mirroring the way I was parented. For me, I just followed my parents around on their errands; when they were busy on the phone, I was quiet. It's a different kettle of fish these days: They run the house, and you listen to their music, and you go to their appointments.

If you've never been hated by your child, you've never been a parent.

You don't want your children to look at you like you are anything special other than their dad.

Children aren't happy with nothing to ignore, and that's what parents were created for.

It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father.

My position in the family turned out to be a lucky one; I bore neither the brunt of my mother's newness to parenthood nor the force of her middle-aged traumas, as my younger sister, Ruth, did.

This whole head of the home thing has been blown way out of proportion. Some guys just take it way too far. Some parents take it way too far. Yet children need guidance. They need a parent to help and guide them. They also need a friend. They need a confidant.

Alright, alright, I admit it: my husband is the quiet, kind, accepting parent, and I'm the one who wants so much to be part of our two daughters' lives than I can't even let them finish a story without interrupting.

There are illegitimate parents, but I don't believe there are any illegitimate children.

When you have children, your perspective on the parent-child relationship alters.