I had Courtney Love's left bosom out of her dress on my plate in front of me. It was extraordinary. I didn't know where to look.
No, it's funny, when I eat out it's not typically in the kind of restaurants people might imagine.
I simply cannot imagine why anyone would eat something slimy served in an ashtray.
Spaghetti can be eaten most successfully if you inhale it like a vacuum cleaner.
YOU are using a frisbee as a plate." "Uh, what? I'm not using a--oh hang on, this is a frisbee. Weird." Victor glared at me. "Dude, calm down, I'll wash it afterward. It's probably dishwasher safe.
I really only eat burritos in Tijuana from street corners that come out of coolers from businesses with no name, telephone or website.
Oliver Reed was a great man who did things his own way. He used to come into Harveys, my restaurant in Wandsworth, and sit on the floor to have a drink before going to the table.
Do not approach with anything even resembling assurance a restaurant that moves.
Kids today and for the last 20 years have held the fork and knife in unbelievable ways. They hold the fork with a fist and the knife like a saw and they shovel it in. It doesn't matter to them which way they hold their knife and fork. They eat every which way. I'm amazed they get food into their mouths at all.
