While studying at Barcelona, Ignatius was in doubt whether, after completing his studies, he should enter some Religious Order, or go from place to place, according to his custom. He decided to enter upon the religious life.
The voice that called us years ago still calls us today. Every monastic day is a new monastic beginning.
I grew up in church. My mom's a minister, and my grandmother was an ordained minister. I was always very mindful of the presence of a greater being I call God.
Two of my aunts are Catholic sisters.
When I was in sixth grade, I wanted to become a priest.
I want to be a pastor in a high school.
I became a minister of the Eucharist when I was 17. My parents aren't very strict Catholics, but for some reason I decided this is what I want to do, and I have kept it up.
I wanted to be a nun. I saw nuns as superstars. When I was growing up I went to a Catholic school, and the nuns, to me, were these superhuman, beautiful, fantastic people.
I studied with the idea of becoming a Catholic priest.
Some of the priests from the Seminary were in the nunnery every day and night, and often several at a time.
I think I would like to be a monk. I really considered Catholicism a few years ago, but there were some things that I just couldn't reconcile.
I brought all the instincts of a writer with me into the monastery.
Imagine, to become a priest there are eight years of study and preparation, and then if after a while you can't do it, you can ask for a dispensation, you leave, and everything is OK.
Anyone who wants to be pope doesn't care much for themselves, God doesn't bless them. I didn't want to be pope.
Had I been more religious in my youth, I might have become a pastor, for it was the pastoral role I'd sought.
From my youngest days, I always felt certain affinities with the idea of being a preacher.
When I was a little kid going to Methodist church, I actually envisioned one day that I would become a minister but I never pursed that.
I heard the call to give up all and follow Christ into the slums to serve Him among the poorest of the poor. It was an order.
Consecrated life means going to the very root of the love of Jesus Christ with an undivided heart and putting nothing ahead of this love.
What cursed spirit of falsehood moveth priests to close themselves within stone walls for all their life, since Christ commanded all his apostles and priests to go into all the world, and to preach the Gospel?
I was a lousy nun. I couldn't do it. I couldn't find God. It wasn't suitable for me. It is suitable for very few people.
At the end of four years' time, at graduation, we were down to 12. At our reunion that we had several years ago, only 1 out of the 52 actually made it to ordination and priesthood. So there you go, there's your numbers.
I am very much looking forward to being a parish priest.
Maybe, just maybe, I would like to become a real spiritual teacher, a working lama!
I've got deeper journeys to take. Metaphysical journeys. Journeys to see Christ. Shaman journeys. It's what I've been elected by God to do.
