Joke Ownership Quotes

I can't defend someone else's jokes. I can only defend my jokes, and I have to live with my own jokes.

When somebody says that a comic steals jokes, it's the ultimate betrayal of comedy.

People try to put ownership on things: 'That's mine, that's my joke.' No such thing. Like if you tripped or stumbled and people go, 'Oh, that's Charlie Chaplin.' You know what I mean? You can't own a joke. You can be the guy that tells it the best, but you can't own a joke. Nowhere can you own a laugh.

When I first started on Twitter, a relative asked, 'Aren't you concerned with giving away your jokes?' I don't think of it that way. That's my content, and that's what I do.

It's really stupid to defend your own jokes. That is for other people to do if they choose to.

The one and only thing that every comic agrees on is that you do not steal jokes.

A joke isn't yours. It's used and you don't know where it's been.

I never stole a joke in my life. I just find them before they're lost.

When somebody mangles one of my jokes, that bothers me more than somebody saying that I'm the worst comedian ever.